ER 3x3

1. Susan.

2. Susan.

3. Hey.

4. Good morning.

5. Yes, it is. I'd even go as far to say it's a glorious morning.

6. Didn't your mother teach you not to gloat?

7. What good's a vacation if you can't gloat?

8. Just think. In eight days, you'll be back here

9. slogging miserably through life

10. like the rest of us.

11. Yeah, but tomorrow, I will be in Maui

12. with the sun on my face, drinking a sea breeze.

13. I hope you burn.

14. Thanks for house-sitting.

15. My cat owes you big time.

16. I'll try to remember to feed her.

17. Hope you recognize the hospital when you get back.

18. I hear Anspaugh's got a lot of changes in store.

19. Like what?

20. I don't know.

21. I'm philosophically opposed.

22. That's my new motto. Change is not good.

23. Well, we're getting more residents.

24. Maybe we won't have to work as hard.

25. We'll work twice as hard.

26. What?

27. They're from Southside.

28. Their program is, shall we say

29. less than discriminating.

30. We're going to spend half our time

31. trying to keep them from killing the patients.

32. Okay, I'm coming!

33. Good morning, Dr. Carter.

34. I saw your car in the garage.

35. I didn't want you to oversleep again.

36. Well, I'm not on for another two hours

37. but thanks.

38. I brought you some Borscht.

39. Here, here.

40. They eat this for breakfast in Russia.

41. Hmm.

42. Thank you for helping me

43. fix my tank the other day.

44. I hate this damn thing!

45. It's like dragging an anchor.

46. Just don't light that cigarette around it, okay?

47. Oh. By the way

48. I've been feeling this waxy buildup in my ear.

49. Would you mind taking a look at it?

50. You know, ears really aren't my specialty

51. but there's a family practitioner

52. who lives on the second floor.

53. Really?

54. And he is so much more qualified than I am.

55. Oh! Thank you, Dr. Carter.

56. I'll be back for that bowl.

57. Okay.

58. Isn't this exciting?

59. Yeah, like a junior high assembly.

60. Here comes the assistant principal.

61. Susan, I want you to meet Margaret Doyle

62. one of our new interns

63. from Southside. Maggie.

64. Pleasure. Hi.

65. Wonder what med school she went to.

66. Guys, come on. Saved you a seat.

67. You look like hell. Did you pull an all-nighter?

68. Yeah, Price is sick so they called me in at midnight...

69. Interrupted a very promising date.

70. Morning, everybody. Thanks for coming.

71. I'm due on

72. the surgical floor in ten minutes

73. so I'm going to make this snappy.

74. We're in trouble.

75. With the closing

76. of Southside hospital

77. we can expect an increase of at least 30%

78. in our normal patient load here at county.

79. To meet these demands, we're going to be instituting

80. the efficiency standards that made the Southside E.R...

81. No offense... The best one in the city.

82. All residents

83. and attendings will see an average

84. of 2.5 patients per hour.

85. Your patient quotient will be checked on a daily basis.

86. The highest PQ wins a gumdrop.

87. The lowest has to wax my car.

88. What about the dead?

89. I'm sorry?

90. DOA's? Train wrecks

91. who croak on the way in?

92. Do we get points for them?

93. Yes, you do

94. but, uh, try not to kill

95. all your patients at once, Dr. Greene.

96. We wouldn't want to draw suspicion.

97. Now, who handles the scheduling?

98. I do.

99. Will you make sure that I'm CC'd?

100. Chart review?

101. That's, uh, me too.

102. I want a daily summary, and budget?

103. It's me.

104. Greene

105. aren't you

106. an attending here?

107. I'm patient ombudsman

108. I run the mentoring program

109. and I'm in charge of staff morale.

110. Well, let's even out the duties a bit.

111. Greene, you take chart review. Get me a report by noon.

112. Can I suggest...?

113. People, change is like a freight train.

114. You're either on board

115. or you're grit in the gears.

116. Same time Tuesday.

117. Oh. I think he likes you.

118. Captioning sponsored by WARNER BROS.

119. It was ugly, the ugliest thing I ever saw.

120. It was big like a bear and fearsome.

121. Well, look what he done to me.

122. What's this?

123. Dante says a kangaroo attacked him

124. in Humbolt Park.

125. That's a nasty cut.

126. Had a claw like a razor.

127. Smelled like an elephant's ass.

128. Exam six.

129. Jerry, who was attending last night?

130. Um, Mishkin.

131. Well, get him on the phone

132. 'cause I can't read his handwriting.

133. It's like Sanskrit.

134. Stuck in chart-review hell?

135. I've been here an hour

136. and I haven't seen any patients.

137. Well, pick it up

138. or you'll be waxing Anspaugh's car.

139. One down. Anyone got the broken tib-fib in Two?

140. Actually, I'd rather you stayed supervised.

141. Doug, did you meet, uh...?

142. Maggie Doyle.

143. Maggie, hey, I'm Doug. How are you?

144. I was handling my own cases at Southside.

145. It's your first day.

146. I'd like you to stick with Doug.

147. Jerry, get on the PA

148. and tell the idiot with the red BMW

149. to get out of my parking spot.

150. Space 37?

151. Yeah.

152. Security told me I could park there.

153. Space 37 is my space.

154. It's been my space for the past three years.

155. Maggie, I'd like you to meet Carol Hathaway.

156. She's our head nurse.

157. She also heads the welcoming committee.

158. I'll move.

159. Good.

160. Who's that?

161. Intern from the Southside.

162. Intern? With a BMW?

163. I thought your car was repossessed.

164. It's still my spot.

165. Before I do the stitches

166. I'm going to give you some medicine

167. so they won't hurt, okay?

168. You know what?

169. I'll even let you choose the color of thread.

170. I've got blue, purple, black.

171. Jeanie.

172. Uh, can I talk to you for a minute outside?

173. Yeah.

174. I'll be right back.

175. You should call a surgical intern to do the sutures.

176. I'm sure the interns have more important things to do.

177. Have you told the mother and the patient

178. that you're HIV positive?

179. None of your damn business.

180. All right.

181. This is just going to hurt for a second.

182. Jerry, get these charts out of my face

183. and get me a sick person to fix.

184. Actually, the board is covered right now.

185. Kleinman's been turfed to neuro

186. Figueroa... has been discharged

187. and Nguyen signed out AMA.

188. Your labs on Otis and Fenning came up.

189. Okay. Thank you.

190. You're cooking.

191. I heal 'em and deal 'em.

192. Besides, in...

193. 46 hours and 18 minutes I will be in...

194. Don't say it.

195. Maui, Maui, Maui.

196. You're cruel.

197. I haven't had a day off

198. since Christmas.

199. Why don't you come with me?

200. Yeah, right.

201. You're kidding, right?

202. Uh, I-I don't know.

203. I mean, you have the time coming

204. and there's plenty of people

205. to cover for you.

206. What about your cat?

207. I can ask a neighbor.

208. Mark! This guy's crashing.

209. I'm coming.

210. We'll talk later.

211. Sure.

212. Good morning. How are you?

213. I've been better.

214. Me too.

215. So did you see if the triage nurse

216. brought your chart back?

217. I don't know.

218. So what seems to be the problem?

219. Kidney stones.

220. I've had them in the past.

221. Woke up with the same pain this morning.

222. It starts back here

223. and it works its way around front

224. and then down.

225. Yeah. Sounds like a stone.

226. They're probably going to want a cat scan.

227. Let's get you in a gown first.

228. Do you eat a lot of ice cream?

229. Yes, actually.

230. Drink tea?

231. Almost every day.

232. Why do you ask?

233. Well, calcium from the ice cream

234. combined with the oxylate in the tea

235. forms calcium oxylate stones.

236. A simple ionic bond.

237. Makes sense.

238. Mr. Sidowski?

239. That's right.

240. I was in your chemistry class at Saint Monica's.

241. Carol.

242. Hathaway.

243. Second row...

244. right near the window.

245. God, I can't believe you remember.

246. I remember the good ones.

247. I always knew you'd do well.

248. There you are, a doctor.

249. Do you specialize in emergency medicine

250. or surgery or..?

251. No. I'm a nurse, actually.

252. In the E.R.

253. A nurse?

254. Well.

255. That's wonderful.

256. What's the story?

257. They found him obtunded at his board and care.

258. BP's 50/30.

259. Pulse weak at 130.

260. No tendon reflexes.

261. No response to pain.

262. This IV's blown.

263. His vein's too weak to hold it.

264. What's his name?

265. Johnson.

266. Mr. Johnson? Mr. Johnson?

267. He seems plenty gorked to me.

268. How old?

269. Eighty-nine.

270. Does anyone know what his

271. quality of life was like?

272. I'm calling his board and care.

273. Find out if he's got a living will?

274. I don't want to get into

275. heroic measures if he's DNR.

276. I don't get a pulse.

277. He's bradying down.

278. You getting through?

279. They put me on hold.

280. All right, let's bag him.

281. Break out the atropine.

282. This is ridiculous.

283. It's a crime.

284. Every surgical intern is in the OR today.

285. Everyone but us.

286. Benton let me spend more time in the OR

287. as a med student.

288. Man, the man... the man is a sadist.

289. Look at this.

290. Edson's double bypass?

291. No, but geez.

292. No, Keaton. That's Abby Keaton.

293. Pediatric surgeon.

294. She used to be at Southside.

295. Oh, man.

296. What?

297. Benton's going to try for an elective with her.

298. No way. Mm-hmm.

299. He signed up for thoracic

300. with the new chief.

301. Then why did I see him reading

302. Essentials of Pediatric Surgery?

303. Benton and kids?

304. See, it's the most difficult specialty.

305. It is impossible to get into.

306. It is exactly what he'd go for.

307. I don't buy it.

308. Benton's no Mr. Rogers.

309. It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood

310. boys and girls.

311. Gant, cover med-surg today.

312. I heard that you signed up

313. for a thoracic elective with Anspaugh.

314. Oh, Carter. Pre-ops and transfers for you.

315. Any chance we might get into OR?

316. Today?

317. Maybe... possibly...

318. Call surgery! Tell them we got

319. a major chest impalement!

320. What happened?

321. A motorcyclist hit a glass truck.

322. Start an IV. And set up the rapid infuser.

323. Okay, let's move him.

324. Ready. And...

325. Go.

326. Oh! Watch out.

327. BP's 70.

328. He's getting dusky.

329. Try for a 16 gauge... He needs more volume.

330. He's seizing. Someone hold his arm.

331. Ativan, two.

332. Use both hands.

333. Get the needle in.

334. He's moving.

335. Wait, wait.

336. Okay.

337. Now. Now!

338. Rapid infuse the o-neg.

339. No breath sounds on the right.

340. Tension pneumo.

341. Damn. Connie? Hold his head.

342. Jeanie, grab hold of this glass and watch

343. your hands.

344. Pulse ox is down to 70.

345. Jeanie?

346. Get over here now.

347. I'll get someone.

348. Jeanie?

349. Jeanie!

350. Malik, they need you in there.

351. I'm going to the lab.

352. I'll take them. Go.

353. Go.

354. Do you pluck your eyebrows?

355. Uh... wax.

356. They look good, girl. You do it yourself?

357. No, I found this place on Dearborn.

358. Time?

359. 12 minutes.

360. More Epi?

361. I guess.

362. What's going on in there?

363. The board and care

364. found medical records

365. but no DNR.

366. Let's hear it.

367. He's got COPD.

368. Renal failure, congestive heart failure

369. prostate cancer, diabetes.

370. Any family we can contact?

371. A son. They're trying to reach him.

372. If I ever get this old, I want "do not resuscitate" tattooed on my forehead.

373. Get this. His PH is 6.97.

374. All right, he's been down long enough.

375. Time of death:

376. 10:06.

377. Get a strip.

378. I'm going next door.

379. Mark.

380. He's got a rhythm.

381. It won't last.

382. BP's 50 palp.

383. Guess we better put him back on the mask.

384. Tough old geezer, ain't he?

385. So she asked you to come to Hawaii.

386. Yeah, but I don't know what she meant.

387. Well, seems fairly unambiguous.

388. Well, if she meant it as a friend

389. then that means separate hotel rooms right?

390. Right, or you could be sharing a bed.

391. Right.

392. All right. Well, you get adjoining rooms

393. with a broken lock and you see what happens.

394. You're not helping.

395. What do you think she meant?

396. Well, I think she meant

397. something a little more than friendship.

398. Yeah, and how do you feel about that?

399. Well, I'm...

400. You're interested?

401. Maybe. Get on a plane, Humphrey.

402. Well, what if that's not what she meant?

403. Three hours divided by seven patients is 2.33.

404. How's it going, Mark?

405. Three hours, one patient.

406. I'm on a roll.

407. Jerry, I'll take that plantar wart in five.

408. You got it.

409. Neuro come down for Mr. Johnson?

410. Who?

411. That Gomer that came back to life.

412. Oh, yeah, they wouldn't take him.

413. They said he's a renal case.

414. Yeah, well then try renal okay?

415. We've got to get him out of here.

416. Jawohl. Hey, your wart.

417. Oh, right. Thank you.

418. Could I have some more soup?

419. Whose patient is Johnson?

420. Why?

421. He stopped breathing.

422. They need you in two.

423. I'll take it.

424. Has anyone seen Jeanie?

425. She went on break.

426. More soup?

427. Shh. Quiet.

428. Of a sighting of a kangaroo in Humbolt park.

429. Yep, you heard me.

430. Lydia, come here.

431. The mystery marsupial was recently sighted

432. hopping along the Kennedy expressway.

433. The Department of Animal Control has issued a warning

434. that kangaroos can be dangerous

435. and have been known to attack when threatened.

436. Soup?

437. So... you asked him to go with you?

438. It just popped out.

439. Have you guys ever...?

440. No!

441. But you asked him to go to Hawaii.

442. I mean, that's... that's pretty bold.

443. Oh, it's stupid.

444. I mean, Mark and I are friends.

445. We work together

446. and I basically invited him into my bed.

447. What did he say?

448. Oh, he was appalled.

449. He couldn't wait to get away from me.

450. Oh, I'm such a fool.

451. Uh, how long is Anspaugh going to be?

452. One never knows.

453. Dr. Benton.

454. Carter...

455. What are you doing here?

456. I just admitted a woman with a lipoma.

457. She's going to need surgery.

458. A fat tumor? It can wait.

459. Hey, well, she wants it out today.

460. All right. Well, then

461. go ahead and book an OR, all right?

462. Can I assist, please?

463. Yeah, whatever.

464. Just get out of here, all right?

465. Solid.

466. Hey, this guy in the picture with Dr. Anspaugh...

467. Is that, um...

468. General Schwarzkopf.

469. They were roommates at West Point.

470. Judith, I'll be in neonatal.

471. Hey, uh, Dr. Anspaugh, I chose cardiothoracic

472. as my eight-week elective.

473. Congratulations.

474. Means you're on my team.

475. Uh-huh. But I just found out today

476. that Dr. Keaton's coming here.

477. Yes. Very, very happy to have her.

478. Yes. I know... I followed her work.

479. Do I sense a wind shift, doctor, uh...

480. Benton.

481. Look, Dr. Keaton is one of the finest

482. pediatric surgeons in the country.

483. An opportunity to work with her is hard to pass up.

484. Well, she may not have a slot for you.

485. Well, I'd like to see.

486. I'll give you until 6:00.

487. So if I don't get the pedes

488. I'm still on for thoracic, right?

489. Dr. Benton, if I don't hear from you by 6:00

490. you get neither.

491. Jane, I'm Dr. Ross; this is Dr. Doyle.

492. Hi.

493. I understand you've been having some pain

494. when you urinate.

495. Yeah. I think it's a bladder infection.

496. I had one before.

497. Uh, when was that?

498. Last year.

499. Okay. Any soreness or tenderness?

500. Um, just when I go to the bathroom.

501. Are you sexually active?

502. Have you ever had intercourse?

503. Oh, no.

504. Okay, well, we're going to do some tests.

505. When we get those back, we'll talk some more.

506. Okay?

507. Okay.

508. All right.

509. So what do you think?

510. Either an STD. Or she's pregnant.

511. Based on?

512. Her sweater... cashmere, probably Neiman Marcus.

513. Why does a rich girl come to a county ER?

514. She doesn't want her family doctor what's wrong.

515. Okay, so what do you do?

516. Dip her urine and do

517. a pregnancy test for starters.

518. Sounds good.

519. Sorry. The OR's are booked.

520. Dr. Benton sends his apologies...

521. He can send flowers for all I care.

522. You've got a breast reconstruction

523. a thyroidectomy and a hemicolectomy ahead of you.

524. This is important.

525. What is it?

526. It's a pheochromocytoma.

527. A pheo?

528. Her BP is through the roof.

529. If we don't go in soon, she's going to stroke out.

530. All right.

531. Tell Dr. Benton he has his OR.

532. And tell him I like tulips.

533. Jeanie, if you have an explanation, I'm listening.

534. I'm sorry. I haven't been feeling well.

535. I got nauseous.

536. If you're feeling ill to the point

537. where it interferes with your work

538. you should let me know.

539. It won't happen again.

540. Everything else okay?

541. Yeah. Everything's fine.

542. How's Al?

543. He's, uh, he's holding his own.

544. It's difficult.

545. I'm sure it is.

546. Can I help you?

547. Uh, yeah. I need to see Dr. Keaton.

548. You're too late.

549. Well, the patient's still conscious.

550. Come back in three hours.

551. I need to talk to her.

552. You don't know Dr. Keaton very well, do you?

553. Just by reputation. Why?

554. I guarantee

555. that if you go in there right now, the only words

556. she's going to have for you are "get out."

557. All right, look, if I write a note

558. will you make sure she that she gets it?

559. I'm not her secretary.

560. Leave it in her box.

561. Mr. Johnson, your father

562. was found unconscious this morning.

563. He has what we call multisystem failure...

564. Heart, lungs, kidneys...

565. And he may have suffered a stroke.

566. That's like Alzheimer's.

567. No. But it's very serious.

568. Did you ever talk with your father

569. about whether he wanted to use machines

570. to keep him alive

571. if his body were failing?

572. Not a lot, no.

573. Were you and he close?

574. About a hundred miles.

575. I live in Boone County.

576. I smoke hams.

577. Your father is very ill.

578. In all likelihood

579. he may never regain consciousness.

580. And we can use

581. a machine to keep his body alive

582. or we can give him

583. medication to take care of his pain

584. and let nature take its course.

585. As next of kin, it's your decision.

586. What do you think?

587. If it were my father...

588. I would try to make him comfortable

589. in his final moments.

590. Okay.

591. Okay.

592. So I'll get somebody to bring you the papers?

593. You're going to help him, right?

594. I'm sorry?

595. You're going to make him better.

596. I'm not sure that we can.

597. Just don't let him die, okay?

598. All right, Carter, make the incision below the costal margin,

599. straight across, six centimeters.

600. Okay.

601. Now, just like carpentry, measure twice, cut once.

602. Right.

603. Benton, you should have told me you're doing a pheo.

604. Trying to keep all the exotic ones for yourself, huh?

605. What are you talking about? I'm doing a lipoma removal.

606. It's on the board, "pheochromocytoma"

607. in big red letters.

608. Who the hell put it

609. up there?

610. That one.

611. Hey, Carter, Simon's letting me do an Appi.

612. I'm going in.

613. No. It's called Gonorrhea.

614. It's sexually transmitted.

615. It is treatable, but we have to do it right away.

616. Are you going to tell my parents?

617. No. Whether you tell your parents or not

618. that's up to you.

619. I would tell the, uh, boy or boys

620. that you've had sex with.

621. I only did it once.

622. Then you need to tell him.

623. I... I can't.

624. Why is that?

625. Because he won't talk to me.

626. When I see him in the halls

627. he won't even look at me.

628. I feel really disgusting.

629. Sorry.

630. That's all right.

631. I wanted it to be special

632. and it was like I wasn't even there.

633. He didn't even drive me home.

634. Hey Jane, guys who are interested

635. in having sex with you

636. aren't necessarily interested in you.

637. You know?

638. If you want it to be special

639. you're going to have to wait for the right guy.

640. I would suggest waiting a long time...

641. like until you can vote.

642. So, Mr. Johnson's in V-tach.

643. Paddles.

644. Why not?

645. Charge?

646. You pick.

647. 200?

648. 200 it is.

649. Clear.

650. Next contestant.

651. Do I hear 300?

652. 300, sure.

653. 300 from the stunning woman

654. in floral scrubs.

655. Clear. Clear.

656. I'll see your 300 and raise you 360.

657. Mark?

658. What a joke.

659. 360.

660. Clear.

661. And he's back.

662. What a trooper.

663. Congratulations, Mr. Johnson.

664. You are the lucky winner

665. of a brand-new ventilator

666. at a cost of $5,000 a day

667. and as a bonus, your very own chest x ray...

668. Perfect for decorating

669. the small sterile hospital room

670. where you're going to spend

671. the rest of your brief, unconscious life.

672. She's still in there? It's 4:00.

673. She went back in.

674. She's got a four-year-old with a Wilm's tumor.

675. Excuse me, what are you doing?

676. I'm just seeing if she got my note.

677. Look, uh, when Dr. Keaton comes out

678. please, please make sure that she gets this.

679. Yes.

680. I'm Peter Benton, I'm a fourth-year resident

681. and I'm interested in a pediatric surgery elective.

682. I need to talk to her about 6:00.

683. My pager number is...

684. 3376. I can read.

685. Look, just make sure she gets it, okay?

686. Okay.

687. So you always vomit

688. when you screw up?

689. Only when I get written up by the Chief of Staff.

690. Yeah, well, ten migs of Compazine

691. should get your stomach back on its feet.

692. You missed a great appendectomy.

693. I could lose my residency.

694. Retracted the internal obliques, clamped that sucker...

695. My career is over.

696. Ow! Sorry, sorry.

697. Dr. Benton.

698. What makes you think

699. you can assist

700. on a surgery behind my back?

701. Simon needed an intern.

702. I'm your resident.

703. You don't blink without asking me.

704. This afternoon, you're on bedsore duty.

705. If there's a boil, you lance it.

706. If there's a weeping decubitus, you debride it, and if...

707. Anspaugh's leading chief rounds in 20 minutes.

708. Don't be late.

709. Especially you, Carter.

710. He asked for you by name.

711. I can't believe

712. I spent four years in med school

713. and four years as resident

714. so now I can take orders from a guy who smokes hams.

715. Other than that, how's your day going?

716. Just got worse.

717. Who does this belong to?

718. Yep, that's mine.

719. Wear it. We lose 20 or 30 a year.

720. Who invented the stethoscope?

721. I have no idea.

722. Rene Laennec, 1819.

723. You can see I taught her well.

724. Keep hustling, boys.

725. You don't want to end up

726. with the turtle wax.

727. Oh.

728. Hi. Hi.

729. I haven't seen you much today.

730. Yeah, it's been a pretty busy one.

731. So you've been, uh...

732. you've been busy.

733. Yeah, pretty much.

734. So, about Hawaii...

735. How much are the hotel rooms?

736. Rooms?

737. Or a room...

738. for me.

739. Um... yeah, I'll have to check on that.

740. You'll let me know.

741. Sure.

742. Jerry! Jerry, turn on

743. channel five, quickly!

744. They've spotted him again.

745. He was at the railyard an hour ago, I hope he made it through.

746. Remains unknown.

747. That kangaroo watch continues.

748. The kangaroo that mysteriously appeared on

749. Chicago streets, was seen entering this abandoned building

750. at the corner of Kenzie and Maplewood.

751. That's six blocks from my house.

752. Armed fish and wildlife officers have surrounded the building

753. in an attempt to apprehend the animal.

754. They're not going to shoot him, are they?

755. I hope so.

756. That thing looks like a giant rat.

757. Jeanie?

758. You paged me?

759. Yeah.

760. Where's the patient?

761. There is no patient.

762. We need to talk.

763. About what?

764. About my working here.

765. I need to know if you're planning to tell anyone

766. that I'm positive.

767. No, I'm not.

768. Look, Jeanie, I don't agree with what you're doing.

769. But how you handle your patients...

770. That's your responsibility.

771. Thank you.

772. But I do want you

773. to stay away from my patients.

774. And I don't want to be in a trauma room with you.

775. That 13-year-old with the clap

776. has had her ceftriaxone.

777. You want me to write her a scrip?

778. Ten days of doxycycline

779. and tell her to stay away from insincere suitors.

780. You were good with her.

781. Thanks.

782. Listen, uh... Why don't you grab some lunch?

783. I was on all night. I'm kind of beat.

784. I'm going to sack out for about an hour.

785. Sure, I'll round you up when I get back.

786. That's not necessary. Thank you.

787. Susan, can you push some Ketorolac?

788. Actually, I'm suturing a thumb.

789. Do you know where Mark is?

790. Mm, try the desk.

791. Hey, Malik, have you seen Doug?

792. Haven't seen him.

793. Where are all the doctors?

794. Um... are you available?

795. Sure.

796. Exam one.

797. In a minute.

798. Next, we have

799. a 73-year-old post-thyroidectomy

800. exhibiting both Chvostek's and Trousseaus's signs.

801. Treatment?

802. Dr. Carter?

803. Saline diuresis, three to six liters per day

804. plus Pamidronate.

805. A textbook treatment for hypercalcemia, doctor.

806. Unfortunately, this patient has hypocalcemia

807. and you've just stopped his heart.

808. Rest in peace, Mr. Edmonson.

809. Next, we have a...

810. Man, he's gunning for you.

811. You okay?

812. I can't control the muscles in my neck.

813. You're having a dystonic reaction to the Compazine.

814. I am?

815. Yeah, muscle spasms are one of the side effects.

816. So is lip smacking.

817. Help me.

818. The aortography on this patient revealed

819. a small type "A" dissection of the thoracic aorta.

820. Dr. Carter

821. differentiate between type "A"

822. and type "B" aortic dissection.

823. Type "A" involves

824. the ascending aorta and type "B"

825. the descending.

826. Correct.

827. Next, a traumatic amputation.

828. The patient is a 35-year-old female,

829. otherwise in good health...

830. How much longer do I

831. have to wait?

832. They're prepping an OR for you know, Mr. Sidowski.

833. In two hours, you will be stone-free.

834. I have some questions for the doctor.

835. Uh, the surgeon will be down in a minute.

836. He can answer your questions.

837. Excuse me. I'll be right back.

838. I had half a mind to give him saline

839. instead of the painkiller.

840. Why?

841. He flunked me in chemistry.

842. You went to St. Mo's?

843. Yeah, you? Yeah.

844. You know what? I think you were in my history class.

845. Mrs. Hester. Never had her.

846. You might be thinking of my sister. So, listen...

847. What year were you?

848. '88.

849. Oh, see, I was '85.

850. Yeah, Mary's three years older than me.

851. Check Sidowski's urine output before moving him.

852. The last entry was two hours ago.

853. Hey, Jer, Animal Control cop got shot with a tranquilizer.

854. Where do you want him?

855. Exam four. Excuse me, officer, how did this happen?

856. I was trying to hit that friggin' kangaroo

857. that's running around Ukrainian village.

858. My partner got in the way.

859. How about the kangaroo?

860. Hopped the wall.

861. He's still out there.

862. Mr. Johnson?

863. Do you recognize this?

864. What?

865. This was found at your father's nursing home.

866. It's a living will.

867. It says that your father did not want

868. any heroic measures used to prolong his life.

869. A will? What I get?

870. No. What it means is, we never should have

871. put him on the ventilator.

872. We've kept him alive

873. against his expressed wishes.

874. See this? Right here? This line?

875. Does that signature

876. look familiar?

877. Yeah, it's mine.

878. Yes, it is.

879. I got to go put the hams to bed.

880. Except this one.

881. This one's for you.

882. So you'll call me when he wakes up, right?

883. My work number.

884. Bye, Pop.

885. What happened?

886. 30-foot fall off an I-beam. Head trauma.

887. Near amputation of the left leg.

888. I'll get some O-neg.

889. Eight units. And call the reimplantation team.

890. Let's go, trauma two. Let's go.

891. Yeah?

892. Jane wanted to say good-bye.

893. Jane.

894. Thanks for helping me. You've both been really nice.

895. Well, okay.

896. Be careful out there.

897. You, uh, need to get that?

898. Excuse me.

899. Uh...

900. Faint dorsalis pulse.

901. Decreased breath sounds on the right side.

902. Set up for a chest tube.

903. All right.

904. What's going on?

905. 30-Foot high dive

906. facial trauma, multiple open fractures, tension pneumo.

907. He's not breathing.

908. Laryngoscope, now. Move.

909. Lacerated femoral artery.

910. Get me a vascular

911. clamp and suction.

912. Can't visualize the cords. There's too much blood.

913. From where?

914. I don't know. Looks like the nasopharynx.

915. Jeanie can pack the nose.

916. Get a 16 foley

917. and an umbilical clamp. Peter can talk you through it.

918. I thought you were staying out of my traumas.

919. It's not your trauma. I was here first.

920. Pulse ox is dropping. 78.

921. Come on, let's go.

922. Thread the catheter through the nose.

923. Let's move.

924. Can you visualize the balloon?

925. It's down there.

926. Inflate and retract.

927. Artery's clamped.

928. Can you come up here

929. and take over for Jeanie?

930. She's got it.

931. I think I've got it sealed.

932. Clamp it to keep it in place.

933. It's clamped.

934. Peter?

935. Bleeding stopped.

936. He's tubed.

937. Bag him.

938. Nice job, guys.

939. Good breath sounds.

940. All right. Let's get him upstairs. Let's move.

941. Good work.

942. What kind of greens?

943. Yeah, romaine, spinach, alfalfa.

944. Right.

945. Who's he talking to?

946. Australian Embassy.

947. Unfortunately, there was some confusion.

948. We intubated him first, and then, we found the DNR.

949. Yes, I know.

950. Mark...

951. No, no, no, he never should have been put on the ventilator

952. to begin with.

953. I just need the legal okay

954. to take him off.

955. Mark...

956. Absolutely.

957. His pulse ox barely registers.

958. There's not a single functioning organ

959. left in his body.

960. He's got one foot in the grave, okay?

961. This man...

962. Is awake!

963. I'll call you right back.

964. Mr. Johnson, do you know where you are?

965. You're very sick.

966. You were found unconscious at your home.

967. Do you understand?

968. You want me to take that tube out of your mouth?

969. There is a risk of respiratory failure

970. if we take you off the ventilator.

971. Are you sure that that's what you want?

972. All right.

973. What I want you to do

974. is to blow real hard on the count of three.

975. Okay. One, two

976. three, blow.

977. Good, good.

978. You okay, Mr. Johnson?

979. Call me Jack.

980. The Compazine wore off

981. and now, I'm sick to my stomach again.

982. What a day, huh?

983. I just want to go home and go to bed.

984. So, tell me, how much longer

985. are we going to put up with this?

986. With what?

987. With Benton.

988. What else we going to do?

989. I don't know if I can take this abuse for a year.

990. Betty?

991. Betty, what happened?

992. Smoke inhalation.

993. There was a fire.

994. Was anybody hurt?

995. Just me.

996. What about your apartment?

997. It's gone.

998. Everything.

999. Everything.

1000. Everything.

1001. The whole building.

1002. The whole building?

1003. Yes.

1004. My floor too?

1005. Yes.

1006. Yes.

1007. Yes!

1008. She's not here.

1009. I think she went home.

1010. Damn.

1011. So there he was, naked as a jaybird.

1012. I mean, not a stitch.

1013. So I said

1014. "Son, what the hell are you doing?"

1015. He turns, looks straight at me

1016. and says, "Fishing, Pop.

1017. Fishing."

1018. He's a sweet boy.

1019. Just slow.

1020. You want me to call him?

1021. No.

1022. I don't like him driving at night.

1023. We're going to transfer you up to intensive care.

1024. They'll make sure you're comfortable.

1025. Is there anything else I can do?

1026. No.

1027. I had a good spin.

1028. Saw two wars...

1029. Ten Chevys...

1030. Boston, San Francisco

1031. Paris, France.

1032. Married a woman

1033. who put up with me

1034. and died as beautiful as the day we met.

1035. Can't ask for more.

1036. Hi. Uh, is Dr. Anspaugh here?

1037. He's not here.

1038. He was supposed to be here at 6:00.

1039. He was. He left about five minutes ago.

1040. Uh, listen, um...

1041. You have his pager number?

1042. Sorry, I'm new here.

1043. Yeah, beautiful.

1044. Thank you.

1045. Hey, you're Benton, aren't you?

1046. Abbey Keaton.

1047. I'd shake your hand, but I've got pepperoni on mine.

1048. Don's just letting me use his computer till I move over.

1049. Well, it's...

1050. Sorry.

1051. Uh...

1052. It's a pleasure to meet you.

1053. You know what, actually...

1054. I've been trying to get in touch with you all day.

1055. I got your note.

1056. So, you're interested in pediatric surgery.

1057. Yes, I am, very much.

1058. Mm-hmm.

1059. How do you feel about deep-dish pepperoni and anchovies?

1060. Well, um, I don't eat meat, but, hey.

1061. You could scrape it off.

1062. Sit down.

1063. Let's talk.

1064. Gee, it's cold out tonight.

1065. Yeah, it feels like fall.

1066. You off?

1067. Waiting for a break in the rain.

1068. How long have you and Al been separated?

1069. Almost a year.

1070. No chance of a reconciliation?

1071. No.

1072. Mmm.

1073. Must be tough to be sick and alone.

1074. A good friend of mine tested positive last year.

1075. I think I'm one of the two people he's told.

1076. He's a lawyer.

1077. Didn't want to tell his coworkers.

1078. Afraid he might lose clients.

1079. It's got to be hard

1080. to carry that around all day.

1081. It is.

1082. I'm glad you decided to keep working.

1083. It would be a real loss to the patients

1084. if you quit.

1085. Is there anything you need?

1086. No, I'm okay.

1087. Okay.

1088. It's freezing out here.

1089. Well, good night.

1090. Wait, wait. You're serious?

1091. Yeah, yeah.

1092. Aah!

1093. I've given it a lot of thought

1094. and I've decided to be spontaneous.

1095. What the hell, I'm going to Maui.

1096. Good for you.

1097. You don't think I misread the situation?

1098. You don't invite somebody to Maui

1099. to play scrabble by the pool.

1100. So how's that new intern?

1101. Doyle? She's fine.

1102. She's competent, does her job.

1103. What do you think, keep her?

1104. Sure, keep her. Why not?

1105. Mark, I need your signature.

1106. Oh, more paperwork on Mr. Johnson.

1107. Surprise, surprise.

1108. Transfer orders?

1109. Death certificate.

1110. What?

1111. He arrested in the elevator.

1112. ICU never admitted him

1113. so technically, he's still your patient.

1114. Hey, that's my locker.

1115. Gotcha.

1116. So do you get back to the neighborhood much?

1117. Uh, every night. I'm still living

1118. with my parents.

1119. Really?

1120. Yeah, same room I used to share with my sisters.

1121. I'm trying to save money, you know.

1122. You could always sell the beamer.

1123. It was a gift from my dad.

1124. Bought it at a police auction.

1125. Oh, he's a cop?

1126. Third generation.

1127. He wanted me to be the first female commissioner

1128. but I took after my ma.

1129. Oh, she's a doctor.

1130. Nurse.

1131. I was going to be

1132. until I got kicked out of nursing school.

1133. I never was very good at taking orders.

1134. See ya.

1135. Jerry, I don't want that thing eating out of my mixing bowl.

1136. Oh, ma, I'll clean it when I'm done.

1137. Lewis, Weaver, Weaver.

1138. Ross, Lewis. Greene?

1139. Did you work today?

1140. Yeah.

1141. This it?

1142. Uh-huh.

1143. You mean to tell me you worked

1144. a 12 hour shift and you saw only one patient?

1145. It was unusually time consuming.

1146. What was the outcome?

1147. He died.

1148. On the other end of the scale

1149. it looks like we have a tie

1150. between Dr. Lewis and Dr. Weaver.

1151. Last patient, out the door.

1152. Well, congratulations, Doctor.

1153. You win the gumdrops.

1154. Greene...

1155. It's the uh, black Cadillac Seville.

1156. Front row, burgundy interior.

1157. Don't forget the sidewalls.

1158. Is he serious?

1159. No.

1160. I want to talk to you about that invitation.

1161. I'm sorry about that.

1162. No, no, I... I...

1163. I hope you didn't misunderstand me.

1164. I mean, we can still get you a room

1165. if you still want to come.

1166. Oh.

1167. But you can't, that's okay.

1168. I wasn't really serious about it myself.

1169. Right.

1170. So, uh, I'll see you in ten days.

1171. Sure. Don't worry about the cat.

1172. Thank you.

1173. Have a great trip.

1174. Call me.

1175. Yeah, from the pool.

1176. Bye.

1177. Bye.