1. - Don't call me a liar Gordon,Copy !req
2. you don't fucking don't
call me a liar man,Copy !req
3. 'cause if you do that
you're out the fucking doorCopy !req
4. with the camera crew
and I'll tell you that.Copy !req
5. - Kick me out the door.
- Don't call me a liar.Copy !req
6. - Desperate
restaurateur
Alan Love's going bust.Copy !req
7. - Just what I put my whole
life into and everythingCopy !req
8. I have ever earned my whole
life is in this place.Copy !req
9. - Honestly, if I was
Alan I'd come hereCopy !req
10. and fucking fire all of us.Copy !req
11. - Alan's lazy,
crazy chefsCopy !req
12. are taking advantage of him.Copy !req
13. - Gordon, you knowCopy !req
14. - I can't work another
shit day in here.Copy !req
15. - The restaurant is sinkingCopy !req
16. but Alan's too soft to save it.Copy !req
17. Now we're in choppy waters.Copy !req
18. Alan's in denial about
the whole mess.Copy !req
19. There's no reasoning
with you is there?Copy !req
20. At times like this I
think you deserve to sink.Copy !req
21. - He ain't god, he's
Gordon Ramsay,Copy !req
22. a successful businessman.Copy !req
23. Screw him.Copy !req
24. - I've arrived earlyCopy !req
25. to surprise a fancy oyster barCopy !req
26. in Brighton's bohemian
Kemptown District.Copy !req
27. My challenge is
called Ruby Tates.Copy !req
28. It's in a camp alternative areaCopy !req
29. where most people read
the Guardian.Copy !req
30. They like eating out but
they do so with a conscience.Copy !req
31. Morning sir.Copy !req
32. But they're taking it
a bit too farCopy !req
33. with their pretty boy eco-taxis.Copy !req
34. Fucking hell.Copy !req
35. Rumour has it that I
am a bit of a gay icon,Copy !req
36. yeah, featured in the
top 10 last yearCopy !req
37. and yeah, bit of a worry,
every year we're going up.Copy !req
38. This is a perfect area
to set up a restaurant.Copy !req
39. It's got a really nice
social buzz about it.Copy !req
40. They're not short of
money round here.Copy !req
41. This is almost like
sort of Soho on the sea.Copy !req
42. Oh, dear, oh, dear, can't
exactly jump the lightsCopy !req
43. in this fucking thing can you?Copy !req
44. Former star of stage
and screen, Alan Love,Copy !req
45. opened upmarket seafood
restaurant Ruby Tates a year
ago.Copy !req
46. He thought he'd spotted
a gap in the marketCopy !req
47. for fancy dining.Copy !req
48. - It's a different atmosphere,Copy !req
49. a totally different atmosphereCopy !req
50. to a normal restaurant.Copy !req
51. People don't just come to eat,Copy !req
52. they come for the
dining experience.Copy !req
53. - Alan serves up
expensive seafood to Kemptown,Copy !req
54. trouble is no-one wants itCopy !req
55. and he's losing a grand
and a half a week.Copy !req
56. - Yeah, I think fish is
the way forward,Copy !req
57. the oysters and the
fish is somethingCopy !req
58. that's going to be bigger inCopy !req
59. in the very near future,
not the distant future.Copy !req
60. - Undeterred by
his huge losses,Copy !req
61. Alan thinks he's got it rightCopy !req
62. and spends his time dreaming
of his great starring roles.Copy !req
63. - A lot of West End shows, Cats,
Godspell.Copy !req
64. This is my stage here, you know,Copy !req
65. this is where I get
up and perform.Copy !req
66. One door open.Copy !req
67. Yeah, I call it the
Alan Love ShowCopy !req
68. but it's kind of isn't
the Alan Love ShowCopy !req
69. it's just me, yeah.Copy !req
70. If people laugh I don't care
whether they laugh with meCopy !req
71. or at me, as long as they laugh.Copy !req
72. - While Alan
dreams of his past,Copy !req
73. he ignores the kitchen,Copy !req
74. leaving it all to his two chefs.Copy !req
75. First there's laid-back
Aussie traveller Jamie.Copy !req
76. - There's no sort of
passion there,Copy !req
77. there's no fucking motivationCopy !req
78. to fucking come to work,
you know.Copy !req
79. I'll be honest with you,Copy !req
80. I'm just doing it for the
fucking, for the maller man.Copy !req
81. - But there's also
volatile fiery Frenchman AlexCopy !req
82. who can't control his temper.Copy !req
83. - Thank you, you go out.Copy !req
84. You go out please.
- I ask you to.Copy !req
85. - Please you go out.Copy !req
86. - You are.
- Please you go out.Copy !req
87. - You don't.
- Thank you darling out,Copy !req
88. you don't come back in kitchen.Copy !req
89. I don't care what
people think of me.Copy !req
90. You know, only people I care
is like my fucking parentsCopy !req
91. and my girlfriends, alright?Copy !req
92. - Everything's great
apart from the fucking.Copy !req
93. - But
everything isn't great.Copy !req
94. Alan's about to go bust and
he's in denial about it.Copy !req
95. - The genius of the peopleCopy !req
96. in the world that are geniuses
they surround themselvesCopy !req
97. with genius, that's
their genius.Copy !req
98. Andrew Lloyd Webber
is one example.Copy !req
99. - I'm the nice guy
he's a (beep).Copy !req
100. - And what I try and do
in the kitchenCopy !req
101. is have the best that
I can afford to have.Copy !req
102. - Honestly, if I was
Alan I'd come hereCopy !req
103. and fucking fire all of us.Copy !req
104. But he doesn't, man, he's
paying us to fucking,Copy !req
105. he knows we sit on our arse.Copy !req
106. - They're not
expecting me at Ruby TatesCopy !req
107. 'til this evening.Copy !req
108. - Right, I really want to
catch this restaurant napping,Copy !req
109. I'm going to jump in there
now and join a table for lunchCopy !req
110. and see what they serve
normal customersCopy !req
111. without them knowing
that I'm coming.Copy !req
112. For the first time I've secretly
asked a couple of foodiesCopy !req
113. to go under cover and
order for me.Copy !req
114. I don't want the chefs making
a special effort on my behalf,Copy !req
115. I want to eat what gets
served every day.Copy !req
116. - It's not five star,Copy !req
117. it's not even three star,
but in the end it's not shit.Copy !req
118. - Three course menu, 25 quid.Copy !req
119. - How are you?
- How are you?Copy !req
120. - Good to see you mate,
I caught the early train.Copy !req
121. - Oh, the early train?Copy !req
122. - Yeah.
- Okay.Copy !req
123. - How are you, are you well?Copy !req
124. - Welcome to Ruby Tates.Copy !req
125. - Is he already in then?Copy !req
126. He's out there.Copy !req
127. Yeah, you fucking got us.Copy !req
128. - My dining
companions have orderedCopy !req
129. a plat of fruits de mer
usually served cold.Copy !req
130. That's the strangest plat
of fruits de merCopy !req
131. I've ever seen in my
entire life.Copy !req
132. Where's the ice, it's
actually hot man.Copy !req
133. - It's warm, yeah.Copy !req
134. - That's a first.Copy !req
135. Well, you'd think for 55 quid
they'd take the shit sackCopy !req
136. out of the lobster wouldn't you?Copy !req
137. Damn, I don't think it works,
though, gritty lobster.Copy !req
138. - Bon appetite.Copy !req
139. - How was your, how
was your oyster?Copy !req
140. - Interesting, I don't
fancy those though.Copy !req
141. - This expensive seafoodCopy !req
142. just goes stale as
no-one's buying it.Copy !req
143. It smells.Copy !req
144. - Oh, dear, it's not for me.Copy !req
145. - And it looks like
someone's put a dog's dickCopy !req
146. in the fucking oyster poison.Copy !req
147. Jesus Christ, what
happened to him?Copy !req
148. Holy fuck, is that normal?Copy !req
149. - Like that, yes.Copy !req
150. - I mean, that's just like a
little rubber elastic band,Copy !req
151. it's like eating the
inside of a golf ball.Copy !req
152. - And what,
what does he say?Copy !req
153. - He doesn't like them.Copy !req
154. He says that's like a golf ball.Copy !req
155. - And that?
- I think he saidCopy !req
156. it was bitter.Copy !req
157. - Bitter?
- Yeah.Copy !req
158. - Alan can you
put that in bin please?Copy !req
159. - Serving old, poorly
cooked seafood is dangerous.Copy !req
160. Whoever's the head chef
shouldn't allow it.Copy !req
161. - Seriously, mate, can you
get that fucking cameraCopy !req
162. out of my face please,
seriously,
just for 30 seconds here.Copy !req
163. You can tell now
everything's shitCopy !req
164. but we don't need Gordon
for tell us thatCopy !req
165. we know that from the
start it's shit.Copy !req
166. - Lemon and cake
are very sauce.Copy !req
167. - The menu is far
too expensive for the areaCopy !req
168. and as for the artwork.Copy !req
169. - Would you
like the dessert menu?Copy !req
170. - Was somebody sick
on the walls?Copy !req
171. - No, the artwork is by
a local artist.Copy !req
172. - There's a pair of
knickers on the wall thereCopy !req
173. on that painting.
- There is, yeah.Copy !req
174. - But is that legit, that is
a pair of encrusted knickers?Copy !req
175. - Yeah, it is.Copy !req
176. And it's part of the
artwork as well.Copy !req
177. - Yeah, why not?Copy !req
178. Next up, sea bass served
on a bed of chorizo.Copy !req
179. That's definitely farmed,
farmed sea bass from GreeceCopy !req
180. and 100 metres from the beach.Copy !req
181. Almost like the chef's given up,Copy !req
182. bored and fallen out of
love with fish really.Copy !req
183. If it's not available
locally caughtCopy !req
184. then take it off the menu.Copy !req
185. - Yeah.Copy !req
186. Another satisfied customer.Copy !req
187. - Meal disgusting, total
cost 175 quid.Copy !req
188. - You all right sir?Copy !req
189. - Good to see you.Copy !req
190. - Good to see you.Copy !req
191. How was your meal?Copy !req
192. - Yeah, interesting
and different.Copy !req
193. - Is he paying for this?Copy !req
194. - It's obvious why people
aren't coming,Copy !req
195. bad food at rip-off prices.Copy !req
196. With turnover being so dire.Copy !req
197. How long can it
continue to stay open?Copy !req
198. Can you get through the summer?Copy !req
199. - No, I mean, I've just
borrowed another 30 grand,Copy !req
200. but that's the end of
it, I've got no more.Copy !req
201. So if that goes it's over.Copy !req
202. - Don't get upset, hey!Copy !req
203. It's good to meet you.Copy !req
204. Don't get upset, hey!Copy !req
205. - Yeah.Copy !req
206. - Get some fresh air.Copy !req
207. I can see it in your face,Copy !req
208. I can see how fucking
painful it is.Copy !req
209. - Well, it's just you get
to the end of the financeCopy !req
210. and when there's no more.Copy !req
211. I didn't realise things were
that fragile, I'm sorry, yes?Copy !req
212. - No, it's not fragile,
it's just, you know,Copy !req
213. sometimes something hits a nerveCopy !req
214. and unfortunately
this hits a nerveCopy !req
215. because you know I try
not to look at it.Copy !req
216. And I try not to think about it,Copy !req
217. But you're still trying to
find the money to pay all that.Copy !req
218. And I'm very proud of
what I've doneCopy !req
219. and it's probably not rightCopy !req
220. and maybe I'm full of crap,Copy !req
221. but it's just what I've
put my whole life intoCopy !req
222. and everything I have
ever earned my whole lifeCopy !req
223. is in this place.Copy !req
224. - Distraught
Alan's right on the edge.Copy !req
225. I'm going to confront
the head chefCopy !req
226. who's responsible for this mess.Copy !req
227. - Gentlemen, Mr. Ramsay
would like to say hello.Copy !req
228. This is Jamie.
- Jamie.Copy !req
229. - Afternoon sir.Copy !req
230. - How are you buddy,
are you well?Copy !req
231. You're from where?
- Australia.Copy !req
232. - Australia, this is who?
- Isaac.Copy !req
233. - Isaac, how are you buddy?Copy !req
234. - And Alex.
- Nice to meet you.Copy !req
235. - Alex, enchante.
- Enchante.Copy !req
236. - From France.
- From France, oui and.Copy !req
237. - Chef.
- Chef?Copy !req
238. - Not head chef, just a chef.Copy !req
239. - Chef, part-time chef.Copy !req
240. - So you must be
the head chef?Copy !req
241. - No, I'm the same as Jamie.Copy !req
242. We work together as a
team always together,Copy !req
243. we have no head chef in
this kitchen.Copy !req
244. - Right, so who takes
charge here,Copy !req
245. I'm just trying to
figure out the.Copy !req
246. - No-one.
- The set up of the kitchen.Copy !req
247. - What the menu
or the kitchen?Copy !req
248. - Both, fuck me.Copy !req
249. - No-one really look,
honestly man,Copy !req
250. look, we just get, sort
of get the job done.Copy !req
251. - We're in the shit my friend
and your attitude stinks.Copy !req
252. Why are you here then?Copy !req
253. - Just to get a bit of money
and travel on, I'm moving on.Copy !req
254. I'm not here to be a hero.Copy !req
255. - I'm not asking you
to be a hero,Copy !req
256. I'm just asking you to
find some form of passion.Copy !req
257. Let me talk to you about lunch.Copy !req
258. The plat of fruits de
mer was fucking hideous.Copy !req
259. How the fuck can I sit in
the restaurant,Copy !req
260. beach a hundred metres
in front of meCopy !req
261. and eat a farmed sea
bass from GreeceCopy !req
262. that should be in a
fucking Chinese restaurantCopy !req
263. in the middle of Soho?Copy !req
264. - 'Cause it's hard
to get fish in Brighton.Copy !req
265. - What?
- Yeah.Copy !req
266. I know it's wrong, I
know it's wrong.Copy !req
267. Like close to the sea
you're supposed to haveCopy !req
268. 20 fish when I'm on the
fucking seafront.Copy !req
269. - There's no fresh fish
in fucking Brighton?Copy !req
270. - Where, what shop, where
we can buy that?Copy !req
271. - What shop?Copy !req
272. - Like fish supplier?Copy !req
273. - What about the fish market?Copy !req
274. Alex, you're 32 years of age.Copy !req
275. - Yes.Copy !req
276. - Yeah, you speak fucking
good English, yeah?Copy !req
277. - Yeah.
- And your attitude stinks.Copy !req
278. - Why she stinks, tell me?Copy !req
279. - (foreign language)Copy !req
280. - Don't judge me like that,
you know,Copy !req
281. because it start to
pisses me off now.Copy !req
282. - Have you given up?Copy !req
283. Yeah, I told you, yeah,Copy !req
284. - I given up all that
because I'm not interestCopy !req
285. enough by what I do every day.Copy !req
286. - So why don't you
fuck off back to France?Copy !req
287. - Just about all the customers
go out and say it's great.Copy !req
288. What can I tell you?Copy !req
289. You know, in their defence,
you know, not my defence but.Copy !req
290. - I can't believe my ears,Copy !req
291. Alan denies there's anything
wrong with the food.Copy !req
292. This guy's lost touch
with reality.Copy !req
293. How long can you both continue
taking the piss out of him?Copy !req
294. That guy burst into
tears in the bar.Copy !req
295. I don't know if you've realised
how fragile he is right now?Copy !req
296. - Yeah, we know.
- Yeah, I do.Copy !req
297. - He looks like a guy
who's about to fuck offCopy !req
298. on Brighton Pier and
jump off the end.Copy !req
299. Sentimental old actor Alan
Love's posh seafood restaurantCopy !req
300. is about to fold and he's
harbouring a dark secret.Copy !req
301. - One would think that
if you openedCopy !req
302. a seafood restaurant you'd
actually like to eat seafood.Copy !req
303. - I have a bit of an
aversion to fish, yeah.Copy !req
304. Just because I had a bone
in my throat to clearCopy !req
305. and three days and I couldn't,Copy !req
306. I had a real problem with itCopy !req
307. and if I get a bone I get
physically sick.Copy !req
308. - How old were youCopy !req
309. when you got the bone
stuck in your throat?Copy !req
310. - Probably about five.Copy !req
311. Five, how old are you now?
- 60.Copy !req
312. - 60.
- It's been a while.Copy !req
313. - It's absurd.Copy !req
314. How can Alan judge his menu
if he doesn't even eat it?Copy !req
315. But what else is wrong?Copy !req
316. I want to know what the
locals think.Copy !req
317. You look cool, trendy, dapper.Copy !req
318. - Yeah, thanks very much.
- If I said to you the wordCopy !req
319. Ruby Tates what does it mean?Copy !req
320. - Ruby?
- Tates.Copy !req
321. - Sort of curry thing I suppose.Copy !req
322. - Ruby Tates, what does it mean?Copy !req
323. - Something to do with potatoes.Copy !req
324. - Why
haven't you been in?Copy !req
325. - The decor.Copy !req
326. - Pretentious, no
substance perhaps.Copy !req
327. - What do you think
of the decor?Copy !req
328. - A bit 80s.
- Yeah.Copy !req
329. Yeah, just looks a bit wacky.Copy !req
330. - What do you look for in
a seafood restaurant here?Copy !req
331. - Fish and chips.Copy !req
332. - Alan's ponsy restaurant
offers very expensive,Copy !req
333. badly cooked seafood, stupid
decor, meaningless nameCopy !req
334. and what the people of
Brighton want is good,Copy !req
335. locally caught fish
cooked simply.Copy !req
336. Farmed sea bass and a
hot plat of fruits de merCopy !req
337. will not get the punters
back into Ruby Tates,Copy !req
338. that's for sure.Copy !req
339. The slack chefs are
paid well to cook dross.Copy !req
340. I need to investigate
what they're doing wrong.Copy !req
341. Expensive lobster will only
attract niche customersCopy !req
342. and they won't come back
if it's badly cooked.Copy !req
343. M adam, what did you have?Copy !req
344. - I had the poached lobster.Copy !req
345. - The poached lobster.Copy !req
346. - Which was tepid.
- A bit dire.Copy !req
347. - Was it tough?
- Yes it's tough.Copy !req
348. - Yeah, flavourless wasn't it,Copy !req
349. you feel the same.Copy !req
350. - I'm going to
get to the bottom of whyCopy !req
351. this lobster tastes so tough.Copy !req
352. Jesus, how come
they're all cooked?Copy !req
353. You don't cook these to order?Copy !req
354. - No they cook them before.Copy !req
355. They're just blanched in waterCopy !req
356. for like four minutes,
that's it.Copy !req
357. - Really?Copy !req
358. They look like
they've been cookedCopy !req
359. for a lot longer than
four minutes.Copy !req
360. There's so much money in here.Copy !req
361. But why are they all cooked and
separated from their bodies?Copy !req
362. - Because if I
want to use them you seeCopy !req
363. I can pick up straight
away like that.Copy !req
364. - Jesus, look,
another shit sack.Copy !req
365. There's 200 pounds worth
of lobster here.Copy !req
366. Pre-cooking is wasteful
and ruins the taste.Copy !req
367. It's barmy.Copy !req
368. When, when did these arrive?Copy !req
369. - This morning.Copy !req
370. - But they're all open.Copy !req
371. - They arrived this morning.Copy !req
372. - I know, but you're not
serving them are you?Copy !req
373. But they're dead,
they're all open.Copy !req
374. - Some not inside.Copy !req
375. - What, Alex, come on,
fuck me, I'm not blind.Copy !req
376. - I know, I know you're
not blind Gordon.Copy !req
377. - They're, they're open,
every one of them is open.Copy !req
378. So are we using them tonight?Copy !req
379. If we need some, yeah.Copy !req
380. - But you'll kill somebody,
they're all open, they're dead.Copy !req
381. You can't serve them Alex.Copy !req
382. - Yeah, I know that.Copy !req
383. - You're not that
fucking stupid?Copy !req
384. - No, I'm not fucking
stupid about that,Copy !req
385. I know a little bit about fish.Copy !req
386. - So, are we going
to serve these tonight?Copy !req
387. - No.
- Thank you.Copy !req
388. Fucking hell, put
them in the bin.Copy !req
389. Jesus Christ, fuck me!Copy !req
390. Those mussels could
have been fatal.Copy !req
391. I'm going to tackle Alan
about the kitchen disasters.Copy !req
392. Bizarrely he acts like
there's no complaints.Copy !req
393. - There's no
sense in lying,Copy !req
394. I'm telling you the truth,
in general people love it.Copy !req
395. - I'm fucking amazed.Copy !req
396. - At what?Copy !req
397. - I've been here for
the first dayCopy !req
398. I found fucking bought inCopy !req
399. farmed sea bass, open
fucking mussels,Copy !req
400. the most horrendous fucking
plat of fruits de merCopy !req
401. I've ever seen in my entire
life and now you're thinkingCopy !req
402. that it's unfair that
someone's complaining about it.Copy !req
403. - No, I'm not
complaining for it,Copy !req
404. I'm just, I'm telling you what.Copy !req
405. - You're a very good actor.Copy !req
406. - No, no, no, I'm
telling you what I'm told.Copy !req
407. No, I don't need to bullshit
and I'm not gonna lie.Copy !req
408. - Yeah but you
bullshit yourself.Copy !req
409. - Bullshit, no I'm not, no,Copy !req
410. 'cause I've been honest
with you from day oneCopy !req
411. and I would always be honest.Copy !req
412. You're not gonna get lies here,Copy !req
413. you're gonna get the
fucking truth.Copy !req
414. If someone, if people
are complainingCopy !req
415. I tell you people complain.Copy !req
416. They don't complain.Copy !req
417. What do you want off me?Copy !req
418. - It's not about what I
want off you.Copy !req
419. - Oh, I know, I know, but
I'm telling you.Copy !req
420. - You amaze me, you're amazing.Copy !req
421. - I'm telling you the truth.
- You're still acting.Copy !req
422. No, you, no, you're
telling me I'm a liar.Copy !req
423. Don't tell me I'm a
liar, don't do that man.Copy !req
424. I'm not acting, I'm
telling you the truth.Copy !req
425. - Did I, did I call you a liar?Copy !req
426. - Yeah you called me an actor.Copy !req
427. Acting is bullshit.
- What did I just say?Copy !req
428. What did I just say?Copy !req
429. - You said it, you
said people are.Copy !req
430. - You amaze me.Copy !req
431. So the mussels were
fucking closed were they?Copy !req
432. - Yeah, it's got
nothing to do with that,Copy !req
433. I didn't see the mussels
so I'll take your wordCopy !req
434. yes they were closed.Copy !req
435. - Now, listen.Copy !req
436. - I didn't know
that they were open.Copy !req
437. - I ate one.Copy !req
438. - Don't tell me I'm acting
and I'm lying, 'cause I ain't.Copy !req
439. And I ain't man and it
ain't happening.Copy !req
440. It ain't happening.
- You're doing a good show,Copy !req
441. a really good job.Copy !req
442. - Thanks, you're out of
order, you're out of orderCopy !req
443. telling me I'm doing a show,Copy !req
444. I ain't doing a show,
I'm running.Copy !req
445. - You are.
- I'm running, doing things.Copy !req
446. - You don't have to point.
- No, bullshit.Copy !req
447. - I said you amaze me.Copy !req
448. All these things going on
in your kitchenCopy !req
449. and you don't give a fuck.Copy !req
450. You don't give a fuck.Copy !req
451. - Of course I give a fuck
you silly arse.Copy !req
452. - Sorry?Copy !req
453. - Silly arse, you're
a silly arse,Copy !req
454. why do you think I
don't give a fuck?Copy !req
455. How dare you.
- You're scared.Copy !req
456. - How dare you say I
don't give a fuck.Copy !req
457. - You're scared.Copy !req
458. - What am I scared of, what you?Copy !req
459. - You are
scared, no, not me, hey!Copy !req
460. - What?Copy !req
461. - You're scared
about your chefs,Copy !req
462. you're shit scared of them.Copy !req
463. - Oh, am I, okay, fine, fine.Copy !req
464. - You just called me
a silly arse.Copy !req
465. - Yeah, well, yeah.Copy !req
466. - You haven't got the bollocksCopy !req
467. to go in there and tell
them the truth.Copy !req
468. The chefs are taking
advantage of Alan,Copy !req
469. but only because he's weak.Copy !req
470. Alan's in denial about what's
happening in his own kitchen.Copy !req
471. - Where's the boys?Copy !req
472. - Oh, they've gone
outside for a cigarette.Copy !req
473. - Oh, right.Copy !req
474. What?Copy !req
475. - I want you to understand
something really important.Copy !req
476. You may not like what
I'm going to say.Copy !req
477. But whatever it is I'm
here to help.Copy !req
478. And you must never,
ever forget that.Copy !req
479. But what I'm more
concerned about is the factCopy !req
480. that you're in denial.Copy !req
481. - Okay.Copy !req
482. - The minute and the quicker
you come out of denialCopy !req
483. the quicker we can
work together.Copy !req
484. - Yeah, that's the
problem with the kitchen man.Copy !req
485. - How much fucking
lobster is there?Copy !req
486. Now, I feel for you.Copy !req
487. - I'm talking about—.Copy !req
488. - Not just your fucking,
your walletCopy !req
489. but where the fuck you're going
to be in three months timeCopy !req
490. if fucking shit like
that's cooked every day.Copy !req
491. - Well.Copy !req
492. - But I cannot work with someone
that's in complete denial.Copy !req
493. - If that's been the case then,
Gordon,Copy !req
494. I don't know what to say, mate,
because I'm not in denial.Copy !req
495. I'm just saying talk to
me about the problems,Copy !req
496. show me the problems.Copy !req
497. I didn't know today that
the problems existedCopy !req
498. and I should have known.Copy !req
499. I know I'm wrong, I
should have known,Copy !req
500. but I didn't know because I
put trust into the departmentsCopy !req
501. that I felt needed
trust putting into.Copy !req
502. - Can we work together?
- Sure we can work together.Copy !req
503. - Thank you.
- Thank you.Copy !req
504. Oh, the kitchen sucks.Copy !req
505. You know, all the
staff are crap.Copy !req
506. You know what, what the
fuck am I doing here?Copy !req
507. I might as well shut the doorCopy !req
508. and open a fucking bicycle shop.Copy !req
509. - Last night told me everything.Copy !req
510. Expensive food wasted,
leaderless chefsCopy !req
511. and a restaurant owner acting
like everything's fine,Copy !req
512. merrily ignoring the meltdown.Copy !req
513. I've heard Alan's put
his house on the market.Copy !req
514. How are you buddy?
- Hello Gordon.Copy !req
515. - Are you well?
- How are you?Copy !req
516. - Yeah, very well thank you,
how are you?Copy !req
517. I mean, I knew things
were quite fucking badCopy !req
518. but I didn't realise.Copy !req
519. Why do you have to sell it?Copy !req
520. - Just to keep everything going.Copy !req
521. - And where are you
going to live?Copy !req
522. - I don't know yet.Copy !req
523. - Do you
have to sell it?Copy !req
524. - Yeah, of course
I've got to sell it.Copy !req
525. - Is it the pressure
from the bank to sell itCopy !req
526. or is it just cash-flow
for the restaurant?Copy !req
527. - It's just cash-flow for
the restaurant.Copy !req
528. I've just borrowed as much as
I can against the mortgage.Copy !req
529. The mortgage is 430 grand and,
you know,Copy !req
530. the last six months I've
borrowed 140,000 poundsCopy !req
531. to put into the restaurant.Copy !req
532. - Fucking hell, Alan.Copy !req
533. There's a lot riding on this.Copy !req
534. We'll work it out together,
you know that,Copy !req
535. there's just some real
tough decisionsCopy !req
536. that need to be fucking
made and you know that.Copy !req
537. - Yeah.Copy !req
538. - And I can see it's
your fucking life and soul,Copy !req
539. I can see how much it
means to you.Copy !req
540. I totally get it, I read it.Copy !req
541. If we can't save the business
Alan will lose his home.Copy !req
542. - You see the
daily take's.Copy !req
543. - 17 pounds?Copy !req
544. - It's a bit soul
destroying, you see, I mean,Copy !req
545. I've got one day we took three
pound 25, that was a beer.Copy !req
546. - Fucking hell, we're in the
middle of the fucking season,Copy !req
547. we need to find a way of
doubling the turnover.Copy !req
548. I'm not thinking fuckingCopy !req
549. Lobster Thermadore, I'm
thinking,
looking at these figures,Copy !req
550. fucking fish and chips.Copy !req
551. I've got a trick up my sleeveCopy !req
552. to get Kemptown's bohemians
eating en masse at Ruby Tates.Copy !req
553. Sustainable fish, pollock,
lemon sole, gernardCopy !req
554. and done in a different
way where the customerCopy !req
555. gets a choice.Copy !req
556. Is it fried, is it grilled,
is it poached?Copy !req
557. - Mind your feet gentlemen.
- Watch it.Copy !req
558. - Freshly caught fish just
might inspire these chefs.Copy !req
559. Farmed sea bass is out.Copy !req
560. I need something cheap
and sustainableCopy !req
561. for tonight's fish and chips.Copy !req
562. Rumour has it you can't
buy fresh fish in Brighton.Copy !req
563. What the fuck is this?Copy !req
564. - I agree I was wrong.Copy !req
565. - Well, fuck me, a Frenchman
admitting that he's wrong.Copy !req
566. Name me one good, solid
fish that can be aCopy !req
567. perfect fish and chip.Copy !req
568. - Use pollock.Copy !req
569. - Look at that baby.Copy !req
570. Absolutely amazing, and
they're in abundance,Copy !req
571. they're sustainable,
environmentally friendlyCopy !req
572. in terms of we're not
running short of them.Copy !req
573. - That's caught
by a local boatCopy !req
574. landed this morning out
by the channel out here,Copy !req
575. out in the wreck.
- Lovely.Copy !req
576. - Pollock is cheap and
in plentiful supply,Copy !req
577. so no more throwing profits
away on unsold lobster.Copy !req
578. I've never seen them
before, fucking massive.Copy !req
579. Keep it simpleCopy !req
580. it's our favourite, everybody
loves fish and chips.Copy !req
581. - The smart chef's answer
to Alan's financial woesCopy !req
582. is pile them high and
sell them cheap,Copy !req
583. portion after portion of
fish and chips.Copy !req
584. Fucking house for sale
this morning.Copy !req
585. That upset me.Copy !req
586. Don't ask me how fucking
upset this man got,Copy !req
587. it was fucking disgusting.Copy !req
588. It's not your fault but
you're part of it, okay.Copy !req
589. I'm not blaming you individuallyCopy !req
590. but you're working for this manCopy !req
591. and if you're going to
fucking take the moneyCopy !req
592. then do the work for it, okay?Copy !req
593. - Yeah, okay.Copy !req
594. - Jamie, same for you.
- Yes.Copy !req
595. - Just show a little
bit of passionCopy !req
596. to why the fuck you're a chef.Copy !req
597. Do you understand?Copy !req
598. Or I'll pay for your flight
to fuck off back to Australia.Copy !req
599. 'Cause there's no point
you being here.Copy !req
600. - Yeah.Copy !req
601. - You and I are
going to make fish and chips.Copy !req
602. - Okay.Copy !req
603. - Just slightly seasoned, yeah?Copy !req
604. Into the flour, nice
coating of batter,Copy !req
605. yeah and in.Copy !req
606. The batter's given colour and
kick by some curry powder.Copy !req
607. They were in yeah?
- Yeah.Copy !req
608. - Fish comes out, yeah?
- Yeah.Copy !req
609. - Nicely seasoned, nice
piece of pollock.Copy !req
610. Where are the chips please?Copy !req
611. A UK national treasure,
good old fashioned, yeah,Copy !req
612. fish and chips.Copy !req
613. Alan's so hooked on the new
dish he's forgotten his phobia.Copy !req
614. - Oh, you're
eating fish,Copy !req
615. first time you've eaten
fish for a while, good?Copy !req
616. - I've eaten fish.
- Good?Copy !req
617. - Yeah, maybe you will.Copy !req
618. - And it's wonderful
'til I get a boneCopy !req
619. then everybody hike quick.Copy !req
620. Yeah, it's been 40 years
since I've eaten anything,Copy !req
621. any fish at all, and
today I broke the fear.Copy !req
622. - We should sell
nothing else tonightCopy !req
623. except pollocks, because
it's so fresh.Copy !req
624. - Pollock.Copy !req
625. - Pollock, sorry.Copy !req
626. - Not bollocks.Copy !req
627. - Not bollocks (laughter),
pollocks.Copy !req
628. - I'm gambling on the
nation's favourite tonight.Copy !req
629. Only high volume sales and
reasonable prices can save Alan.Copy !req
630. I've invited some Kemptown
locals to tuck in.Copy !req
631. Do you want to go and
have a look outsideCopy !req
632. and see the check?
- I, I just did.Copy !req
633. - Yeah?
- Yeah.Copy !req
634. - And?
- And it looks likeCopy !req
635. it's going to be fun.Copy !req
636. - Busy?
- Yeah.Copy !req
637. - Busy?
- Yeah.Copy !req
638. - Yeah, good.Copy !req
639. - Two more fish of the day,Copy !req
640. that's 11 fish of the
day in total.Copy !req
641. - Love it man, a bit out of
your fucking comfort zoneCopy !req
642. here aren't you?Copy !req
643. Really fucking good.Copy !req
644. - We're full,
but these chefsCopy !req
645. aren't used to hard work.Copy !req
646. Can they cook consistently?Copy !req
647. - Which I have to say I've
never heard of pollock butCopy !req
648. so far, so good.Copy !req
649. Very nice actually.Copy !req
650. - The waitress
recommended it to me, so.Copy !req
651. - When was the last time you
had a nice piece of pollock?Copy !req
652. - I've never had pollock.Copy !req
653. - Never, tonight
it's done in a crispy batter,Copy !req
654. home-made chips.Copy !req
655. - No we're not.
- Good.Copy !req
656. - Order's just
come through.Copy !req
657. - The batter is very
thin and crispCopy !req
658. and it's absolutely lovely.Copy !req
659. And the fish itself
it's such a fine textureCopy !req
660. it melts in the mouth really.Copy !req
661. - That's nearly 20 portions
in the last 15 minutes,Copy !req
662. do you know that?Copy !req
663. No fucking around.Copy !req
664. - Thank you sir.
- Thank you.Copy !req
665. - Six more now yes.
- Yep.Copy !req
666. The restaurant is full up.Copy !req
667. - Already?
- Yeah.Copy !req
668. - For me the most
important thingCopy !req
669. about tonight's fucking foodCopy !req
670. is it's local produce
from down there.Copy !req
671. There's no fucking farmed
sea bass from Greece,Copy !req
672. yeah, there's no lobsters from
fucking, you know, Canada.Copy !req
673. This is local produce,
caught, straight off the boat,Copy !req
674. into the batter and served.Copy !req
675. How was your pollocks?Copy !req
676. - Oh, delicious.Copy !req
677. Very good, very good.Copy !req
678. First time I've had
pollock and I enjoyed,Copy !req
679. I shall have it again.Copy !req
680. - How are yours dear?Copy !req
681. - I can't believe you just
said that to meCopy !req
682. about my bollocks.Copy !req
683. I thought you were great
in 'The Queen' by the way.Copy !req
684. - Fuck off.
- I beg your pardon?Copy !req
685. - That's how you
speak to your people.Copy !req
686. - No, you feel like
we've won, I don't know,Copy !req
687. like you feel you do something,Copy !req
688. you're just proud of yourself.Copy !req
689. That's it, just to do
something different,Copy !req
690. you know, like that.Copy !req
691. - This Tuesday's takings
are phenomenal.Copy !req
692. Alan's made two grand when
he'd normally take 200 quid.Copy !req
693. So if we can do two grand
on a fucking TuesdayCopy !req
694. with 87 of our clients
still having fish and chipsCopy !req
695. and a glass of fucking
wine I'm sold.Copy !req
696. By the time we get to
fucking SaturdayCopy !req
697. we should be sort of, you
know, eight, nine, 10 grand.Copy !req
698. - But from where we've
gone to where we are is.Copy !req
699. - Yeah, we've won nothingCopy !req
700. and tomorrow morning your
house is going up for sale.Copy !req
701. - Yeah.Copy !req
702. - Alan's at last proved
he's got some guts.Copy !req
703. But will he risk revamping
the psychedelic decorCopy !req
704. of Ruby Tates which
the locals hate?Copy !req
705. - Well, I hope they
haven't been worn,Copy !req
706. that's all I can say.Copy !req
707. - Someone's been sick.Copy !req
708. - I'm
running out of time,Copy !req
709. the menu's changing and so
must the decor.Copy !req
710. It's time for the
knickers to come off.Copy !req
711. - I can't let him just
destroy it, I can't do thatCopy !req
712. and I won't do that, you know.Copy !req
713. I've got, you know, I've got
to stand up and be a man.Copy !req
714. It's not, if he turns round
and says all the paintingsCopy !req
715. have got to come off the
wall, change the colour,Copy !req
716. change the tablecloths,
I hate the glasses.Copy !req
717. Well, sorry mate, that's
my opinion, you knowCopy !req
718. and my opinion is really
relevant
'cause it's all my money.Copy !req
719. - Let's have a quick walk
round the restaurant togetherCopy !req
720. and give me the inspiration
behind this ghastly decor.Copy !req
721. - I don't agree with you.Copy !req
722. - Explain the
colours then.Copy !req
723. Is there any method in
your madness?Copy !req
724. - The colours came from the
original painting that I got,Copy !req
725. which I liked, over there.Copy !req
726. - So you
bought the paintingCopy !req
727. and then designed the
restaurant on the back of it?Copy !req
728. - Yeah.Copy !req
729. - It's like
something thatCopy !req
730. Jimmy Savile would keep
his fucking jewellery in.Copy !req
731. - Well, if that's what
you think that's okay,Copy !req
732. I don't, I disagree with you.Copy !req
733. Do you want fish on the wall,Copy !req
734. you know, I mean, do you know.Copy !req
735. - I'd rather have a
fucking pieceCopy !req
736. of fucking fish on the wallCopy !req
737. than a fucking crusty
pair of fucking knickers.Copy !req
738. - No, no, see, that, see,
that insults me as well.Copy !req
739. - What, because
there's a pair of knickers?Copy !req
740. - No, use a pair of knickers,Copy !req
741. don't use a crusty pair of
knickers, it's so out of orderCopy !req
742. because it's so detrimental
to the artist and also to me.Copy !req
743. - Right, so you're taking
it personally?Copy !req
744. - No, that's it now,
that's it now.Copy !req
745. - Yeah.Copy !req
746. - Now, now you're just.Copy !req
747. You've crossed the line again.Copy !req
748. - You're being out of order.
- You crossed the line again.Copy !req
749. - I tell you I don't like
the decor of the restaurantCopy !req
750. you start getting upset.Copy !req
751. - Go for it, go for it man.Copy !req
752. Not happening, we're not
going any further with it,Copy !req
753. it's bullshit.Copy !req
754. Why do you feel the necessityCopy !req
755. to insult me again?
- You're acting again,Copy !req
756. where's the script?Copy !req
757. Where's the script,
read the script.Copy !req
758. - Is this a big defensive thingCopy !req
759. that you've got?
- Read the script.Copy !req
760. - Why don't you read
your own script?Copy !req
761. I'm not taking this shit.Copy !req
762. - Whinging, whinging.
- You're taking your shit.Copy !req
763. - Your shit?Copy !req
764. - I'm not taking this shit,
you got it?Copy !req
765. - Hold on a minute, what
do you mean taking it?Copy !req
766. I'm talking to you about that.Copy !req
767. - I don't care,
it's your opinion,Copy !req
768. that ain't my fucking opinion.Copy !req
769. - You bought it.
- It ain't my opinion.Copy !req
770. You don't like it, tough shit,
I like it.Copy !req
771. - It looks great,
it sounds greatCopy !req
772. and why are you working
yourself up like this?Copy !req
773. - Good, because that's
what it's about.Copy !req
774. - I hit a nerve.Copy !req
775. - That's what it's about,
fuck you.Copy !req
776. - Thank fuck for that,Copy !req
777. it's finally come out.Copy !req
778. Right, shall we get
back to the decor?Copy !req
779. - Let's not.Copy !req
780. Don't call me a liar Gordon,Copy !req
781. you want to fucking
don't call me a liar man,Copy !req
782. 'cause you do that you're
out the fucking doorCopy !req
783. with the camera crew,
and I'm telling you that,Copy !req
784. don't call me a liar.
- Kick me out ofCopy !req
785. the door then.
- 'Cause I don't fucking lie.Copy !req
786. - Kick me out the fucking door.Copy !req
787. Now he walks off.Copy !req
788. Shall we talk about the decor?Copy !req
789. Will you stop acting
like a baby then?Copy !req
790. - No, you stopped act, you
stop acting like a Prima DonnaCopy !req
791. and then we, then we've
both got half a chance.Copy !req
792. - There's no reasoning
with you is there?Copy !req
793. - There isn't
really is there?Copy !req
794. - At times like this I
think you deserve to sink.Copy !req
795. - Okay, Gordon,Copy !req
796. very good of you mate.
- I'm sorry forCopy !req
797. insulting your pantsCopy !req
798. that have been sprayed
18 times with paint.Copy !req
799. They're not crusted, they're
just Dulux coated pants.Copy !req
800. - You know what,
I'm sorry mate I've had it.Copy !req
801. I don't know why we're
discussing this any more,Copy !req
802. you don't want your.
- It's not that bad.Copy !req
803. - You don't want
to do this any more,Copy !req
804. I don't want to do
this any more,Copy !req
805. so why don't we just
call it a day?Copy !req
806. - You've told me to go.Copy !req
807. - Yeah, let's go man.Copy !req
808. You're just being Gordon Ramsay,
maybeCopy !req
809. you can't do anything else.Copy !req
810. - You've got
no right to say that.Copy !req
811. - Sure I've got a right,
I've got every rightCopy !req
812. to say exactly the same
as you say to me.Copy !req
813. - For a man that's that
far in the shitCopy !req
814. you'd think you'd take
something on the chin.Copy !req
815. Acting like a baby
gets him nowhere.Copy !req
816. There's not much more
anyone can do.Copy !req
817. The show's over, I'm
out of here.Copy !req
818. Alan denies the truth
in front of his face.Copy !req
819. He's going down with his
knickers flying half mast.Copy !req
820. - You know what, he ain't
god, he's Gordon Ramsay,Copy !req
821. a successful businessman.Copy !req
822. Do you know what, it
ain't the fucking be allCopy !req
823. and end all of life.Copy !req
824. Screw him.Copy !req
825. - Alan's thrown
me out of Ruby Tates,Copy !req
826. he lost it when I suggested
I change his naff 80s decor.Copy !req
827. - Are you well?
- I'm well thank you.Copy !req
828. - In a last ditch
attempt at reconciliationCopy !req
829. I'm taking him to a successful
rival fish restaurantCopy !req
830. to see how they do it.Copy !req
831. - Yeah.
- Yeah.Copy !req
832. You can go back to Ruby TatesCopy !req
833. and I can be in London
by six o'clock.Copy !req
834. But I think you're missing
one fucking key point,Copy !req
835. I'm not here to get personal.Copy !req
836. - I don't give a fuck
about the piece of art,Copy !req
837. I really don't give a fuck
about the piece of art.Copy !req
838. It wasn't about that,Copy !req
839. it was about the wordingCopy !req
840. and the put down.
- The crusty knickers.Copy !req
841. But that's the way I am.Copy !req
842. Yeah, I know.Copy !req
843. But then, then you.
- And I'm not changing.Copy !req
844. - You've got to
understand that as well.Copy !req
845. - Okay, let's go back to what
we spoke about, the decor.Copy !req
846. What's the first thing you
feel when you walk into here?Copy !req
847. - Personally, cold.Copy !req
848. - Okay, you're cold, stone cold?Copy !req
849. - Yeah.Copy !req
850. - It takes 20 grand a week.Copy !req
851. - Yeah.Copy !req
852. - It makes money,Copy !req
853. it is modern.
- Yes.Copy !req
854. - That's what's got to
happen next to Ruby Tates,Copy !req
855. it's got to be brought
into the 21st century.Copy !req
856. - I do agree, I agree.Copy !req
857. I still have to have
my personality.Copy !req
858. - Yeah, I'm staring at it.Copy !req
859. - Okay.Copy !req
860. - That's the biggest
decor personality,Copy !req
861. you can't buy that shit.Copy !req
862. So that's not decor, that's
you, that is fundamentally,Copy !req
863. absolutely paramount.Copy !req
864. Without you we're fucked.Copy !req
865. Have you always been
this stubborn?Copy !req
866. - Yeah.Copy !req
867. - On stage?
- Yeah.Copy !req
868. - Don't change will you?Copy !req
869. - I will not, no way.Copy !req
870. - Let's get the fuck
out of here.Copy !req
871. - Yeah, thank you sir.Copy !req
872. - Fuck me, ladies first.Copy !req
873. Now we've buried the hatchetCopy !req
874. I need to get back to
saving the business.Copy !req
875. Alan's staff don't respect him,Copy !req
876. he must show them who's boss.Copy !req
877. I've called a staff meeting
on the rolling high seas,Copy !req
878. there's a storm brewingCopy !req
879. and Ruby Tates needs a lifeline.Copy !req
880. Now we're in choppy waters,Copy !req
881. just like Ruby Tates,
you know that.Copy !req
882. - Up and down.Copy !req
883. - On the verge of
fucking sinking.Copy !req
884. Alan can deny the
truth no longer,Copy !req
885. his staff think he's
a walk-over.Copy !req
886. They're going to review
his performance.Copy !req
887. Right now I want all of
you to give me oneCopy !req
888. fucking good point and
one bad point on Alan.Copy !req
889. Seriously think about, yeah.Copy !req
890. One good point and
one bad point.Copy !req
891. This isn't going to be pretty,
Alan's a terrible boss.Copy !req
892. First one, not strict enough.Copy !req
893. Doesn't command my respect.Copy !req
894. Good point, too nice.Copy !req
895. I'm not picking on you here.Copy !req
896. - No, I know you're not
picking on me.Copy !req
897. - I'm trying to fucking.
- Absolutely.Copy !req
898. - Open your eyes up to
what the fuckCopy !req
899. you are doing
running a business.Copy !req
900. And what's coming out of thisCopy !req
901. is that you're just one big
fucking soft, happy go lucky,Copy !req
902. sweetie pie that they
love taking from you.Copy !req
903. Does anyone see you as a boss?Copy !req
904. - No, obviously not.Copy !req
905. - Who do we answer to, no-one.Copy !req
906. No-one knows who to answer to.Copy !req
907. There's no sort of real
leader, there's no bossCopy !req
908. and we need a boss.Copy !req
909. - Can Alan be
ruthless and sack bad staff?Copy !req
910. In this exercise he'll
have to be assertiveCopy !req
911. and decide who stays
and who walks the plank.Copy !req
912. Conviction time, Alex?Copy !req
913. - And I want prove myself
and everybody we can do it,Copy !req
914. and I think it's important
because I'm French and I'm
proud.Copy !req
915. - Alan?Copy !req
916. - But I do think I need
to be assertiveCopy !req
917. and I'm afraid you're just
gonna have to walk the plank.Copy !req
918. - Allez.
- Thank you Alex.Copy !req
919. - On the plank.Copy !req
920. - It's just got to be
the highway kid.Copy !req
921. - Hop it.Copy !req
922. Does she walk the plank?Copy !req
923. - Do you know what, I'm
gonna let Nancy stay hereCopy !req
924. 'cause I think Nancy's
got the heartCopy !req
925. and the experience, and
she works her arse off.Copy !req
926. - Quite possibly the most
laid-back chef in Britain today.Copy !req
927. On the fucking plank.Copy !req
928. - Give me the
fucking job as head chef.Copy !req
929. You need a leader in
there, I'm your leader.Copy !req
930. - It's just 'cause
you're an arsehole.Copy !req
931. Get off the boat.Copy !req
932. - Fuck you.Copy !req
933. - Any last request?Copy !req
934. - Fuck you.Copy !req
935. - Watch this space is
the, the bottom line.Copy !req
936. I can be as assertive
as I need to beCopy !req
937. I'm a tough guy, I'm a
tough guy, I have to be,Copy !req
938. they call it a
Napoleonic complex.Copy !req
939. When you're little people
take the piss out of you.Copy !req
940. - It's fighting talk from Alan,
but he has to prove himself.Copy !req
941. His two chefs have
definitely spoilt the broth.Copy !req
942. Tonight I'm going to choose
just one of them to be leader.Copy !req
943. Every kitchen needs a head
chef for discipline, control,Copy !req
944. insight and fucking
pushing standards out.Copy !req
945. Here they've got very
comfortable, very relaxedCopy !req
946. and it's not busy so why bother?Copy !req
947. A head chef needs to be a
natural leaderCopy !req
948. and cool under pressure.Copy !req
949. Fucking hell.Copy !req
950. Oh, come on guys, fuck me,
not tonight.Copy !req
951. Jamie.
- Yes.Copy !req
952. - Alex, if someone wants
the head chef's job hereCopy !req
953. they've got to work for it,
do you know what I mean,Copy !req
954. they've got to really
bust their fucking balls,Copy !req
955. come out of their shell
and prove to fucking meCopy !req
956. that you are that hungry
for that head chef's job.Copy !req
957. - Listen man, this table 24
has not even been called away.Copy !req
958. - Already
Jamie's getting confusedCopy !req
959. about the orders.Copy !req
960. - Sorry, my bad, my mistake,
my mistakeCopy !req
961. It has been called away.Copy !req
962. You can flow the pastry down
here, he's fucking shafting me.Copy !req
963. - Slacker Jamie's not
used to hard workCopy !req
964. and a stack of orders.Copy !req
965. Relax.
- Okay Gordon.Copy !req
966. - Yeah?
- Yeah.Copy !req
967. - Get a grip and fucking
control it, okay?Copy !req
968. - I'm trying to, I'm trying to.Copy !req
969. - Good, or you fuck off
and I'll do it.Copy !req
970. - Cool, cool, you fuck off,
I'll do it.Copy !req
971. - Hey.Copy !req
972. - I'm going to.Copy !req
973. - No, but, listen.Copy !req
974. - I know.Copy !req
975. - You're more laid-back than
a fucking ironing board,Copy !req
976. so, you know, if you're
gonna muscle in and do it,Copy !req
977. shut the fuck up and do it.Copy !req
978. - I'm trying.Copy !req
979. - Hey, not hard
enough in my eyes.Copy !req
980. Obviously very nervous, yeah.Copy !req
981. Unknown territory for
them, 'cause they're usedCopy !req
982. to being busy one night
a week, Saturday night.Copy !req
983. So, you know, it's Wednesday
and yeah we're busyCopy !req
984. every night of the week,
get used to itCopy !req
985. because that's what it's
like in the real world.Copy !req
986. - Bones both with sauce,Copy !req
987. just one of them on
the bones is with sauceCopy !req
988. and then the other on the
bone is plain.Copy !req
989. - Yeah, I know.Copy !req
990. - As the
orders stack upCopy !req
991. it's Alex who's under pressure.Copy !req
992. Alex it's burning.Copy !req
993. Fucking, oh, fuck me.Copy !req
994. Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.Copy !req
995. Oh, Alex, what are you doing?Copy !req
996. - I'm sorry, I'm sorry.Copy !req
997. - You've fucked
two Dover Sole.Copy !req
998. Oh, we're trying to createCopy !req
999. a fucking reputation here
not destroy it, yeah?Copy !req
1000. - Happy birthday.Copy !req
1001. - Yeah, happy birthday.Copy !req
1002. - And my melon's been
dropped on the floor.Copy !req
1003. - Alex, come here,
listen to me.Copy !req
1004. - Alex lost it tonight,
but Jamie kept his cool.Copy !req
1005. My choice for head chef
is a no-brainer.Copy !req
1006. - It was a tough night, though,
you know, a tough night.Copy !req
1007. It's always hard cooking,Copy !req
1008. cooking's a fucking
hard job anyway,Copy !req
1009. sometimes he loses the plot.Copy !req
1010. But at the same time I'm not
in a position to tell him off.Copy !req
1011. Just for some reason todayCopy !req
1012. I just came out and
started fucking directingCopy !req
1013. the fucking traffic, you know.Copy !req
1014. - There's
still a big problemCopy !req
1015. with the restaurant decor.Copy !req
1016. I've got an idea.
- Okay.Copy !req
1017. - To put a different
colour in here.Copy !req
1018. I don't want to argue.Copy !req
1019. - I'm going with you because I.Copy !req
1020. - Good.
- I've thought it overCopy !req
1021. and I am going to let you
have your headCopy !req
1022. because you've said a lot
of very sensible thingsCopy !req
1023. about moving forward.Copy !req
1024. - Now the decor is in my
hands, Alan's relaxed a little.Copy !req
1025. - But will the
staff accept my choiceCopy !req
1026. for their new head chef?Copy !req
1027. We need to establish a
leader in that kitchen.Copy !req
1028. Alex, it's not you.Copy !req
1029. - I know that.Copy !req
1030. - Last night's
performance confirmed that.Copy !req
1031. Jamie, forget the travels,Copy !req
1032. commit to Alan, do you
understand that?Copy !req
1033. Yeah, I have to do it, I know
I can do it, I want to do it.Copy !req
1034. - One final role that's
missing, Alan's role.Copy !req
1035. Your role, you are the
luvvie, the perfect host.Copy !req
1036. There's a structure and god
help you if you fuck it up.Copy !req
1037. It's high noon,Copy !req
1038. Alan knows Ruby
Tates will changeCopy !req
1039. but doesn't know about my
totally new colour scheme.Copy !req
1040. How are you buddy.
- Hello.Copy !req
1041. - Come in, are you well?Copy !req
1042. - I'm well, how are you?Copy !req
1043. - Yeah, very
well indeed thank you.Copy !req
1044. Right, what's the matter?Copy !req
1045. - I said my god.Copy !req
1046. - My god.Copy !req
1047. Right, first impressions?Copy !req
1048. - Austere.
- Austere?Copy !req
1049. - I just feel it's a bit,
a bit clinical really.Copy !req
1050. I suppose I think I'm a
little bit, well,Copy !req
1051. a bit insignificant now
because I don't feel what.Copy !req
1052. I feel we're going downCopy !req
1053. the kind of Harry
Ramsden style route.Copy !req
1054. - What I'm trying to do, Alan.Copy !req
1055. - Is to make a business.
- Is to make a business.Copy !req
1056. - Yes, I know.Copy !req
1057. - And that's why I'm here.Copy !req
1058. Sure, I do, I do
understand that.Copy !req
1059. - And it is so
important to make it your own.Copy !req
1060. - Yeah.Copy !req
1061. - And this is about as close
to fucking Harry RamsdenCopy !req
1062. as I am to fucking being
head chef in McDonald's.Copy !req
1063. It brings me onto my next bone
of contention, Ruby Tates.Copy !req
1064. - Well, you've stripped
me of everything.Copy !req
1065. - Big, deep breath.Copy !req
1066. I don't fucking care if
you don't like it.Copy !req
1067. I don't fucking care,Copy !req
1068. but you're missing the
most tangible assetCopy !req
1069. of this fucking restaurant,
Love's.Copy !req
1070. Now, you can argue,
call me an arse,Copy !req
1071. do whatever you fucking
want, I don't care,Copy !req
1072. you're missing a trick.Copy !req
1073. - Love's.Copy !req
1074. Yeah, yeah, hot, hot.Copy !req
1075. - Big night tonight, Ruby
Tates has sunk without a traceCopy !req
1076. and, well it looks
beautiful in there.Copy !req
1077. Love's has been reborn.Copy !req
1078. Alan hates the decor, but
what about my new menu?Copy !req
1079. I'm talking about making
this restaurantCopy !req
1080. a pillar in the community.Copy !req
1081. On the board there,
yeah, we've got our fishCopy !req
1082. and for the first time
the customersCopy !req
1083. have got the fish whether it's
poached, grilled or fried.Copy !req
1084. - Right.Copy !req
1085. - So we're using
sustainable fishCopy !req
1086. and making a bit of a
statement with it as well.Copy !req
1087. Poached, grilled or fried,
the customer has the right.Copy !req
1088. To launch Love's
sustainable menuCopy !req
1089. I've invited some foodie
friends, Brighton royalty.Copy !req
1090. Zoe Ball and Norman Cooke.Copy !req
1091. - Good evening.Copy !req
1092. - You're having a laugh,
are, are you with Julien?Copy !req
1093. - Yeah.Copy !req
1094. - Oh, hi, hi, oh,
come in.Copy !req
1095. - It's good to put the
wind up my new head chefCopy !req
1096. with a couple of VIPs.Copy !req
1097. Exciting thing about the fish,
yeah,Copy !req
1098. steamed, poached,
fried or grilled.Copy !req
1099. Fish done, you know,
however you wish,Copy !req
1100. so it's an alternative.Copy !req
1101. - I think in a traditional
fish restaurant Lemon Sole,Copy !req
1102. I reckon it's always a
good gauge as toCopy !req
1103. how good the fish is cooked.Copy !req
1104. Lemon Sole's beautiful.Copy !req
1105. - The kitchen's
already confusedCopy !req
1106. and a lemon sole has
gone missing.Copy !req
1107. - Yeah.Copy !req
1108. - 19.
- Wait wait.Copy !req
1109. Alright have a problem,
there's a fuck-up man.Copy !req
1110. All that is going together,
right?Copy !req
1111. - Alright, this one
will be like,Copy !req
1112. this one turns out like
three minutes away.Copy !req
1113. - All right, cool,
all that.Copy !req
1114. - The chefs can't
afford to screw up tonight.Copy !req
1115. - No, I'm
not sure who's,Copy !req
1116. if they're having lemon butter,Copy !req
1117. poached in lemon butter?Copy !req
1118. - This is, yeah,
this is really important,Copy !req
1119. do you remember the
ticket came first in?Copy !req
1120. - Yeah.
- Not 40 minutes later,Copy !req
1121. you've got to check
and read throughCopy !req
1122. and if you're not too sure,
then you cross it off.Copy !req
1123. - Okay.Copy !req
1124. - Yeah, so is that
three sole or two sole?Copy !req
1125. - It's two sole both
off the bone.Copy !req
1126. - Yeah.
- Okay.Copy !req
1127. - That sorted the messCopy !req
1128. and Zoe's sole is ready to go.Copy !req
1129. It's a delicate silver
service operation.Copy !req
1130. - No, you didn't even blush
or anything, well done.Copy !req
1131. - Enjoy.Copy !req
1132. - That's really, really good.Copy !req
1133. - It's nice.
- Yeah, it's great.Copy !req
1134. - I'm eating pollockCopy !req
1135. which I've never
actually had before.Copy !req
1136. It's really nice, it's a bit.Copy !req
1137. It's a bit like black cod.Copy !req
1138. - Actor, Chris
Ellison, is a seafood fan.Copy !req
1139. - I've been here before so I
can see the transformation.Copy !req
1140. Well, I like it, I think
it's really good.Copy !req
1141. - You can't not love
the name Love can you?Copy !req
1142. So successful name I think.Copy !req
1143. - Tonight Alan's
made two and a half grand.Copy !req
1144. But is he satisfied?Copy !req
1145. - Everyone likes the name,
everybody likes the decor.Copy !req
1146. I'm ready to throw the towel in.Copy !req
1147. So it's good, it's good, yeah.Copy !req
1148. So, well done Gordon, if
you're in there anywhere,Copy !req
1149. see it's obviously working,
he's right,Copy !req
1150. I'm wrong and it doesn't
really matter as long asCopy !req
1151. we're gonna make a success,
that's all we need.Copy !req
1152. Kerching, till, money
in the till.Copy !req
1153. Thanks very much.Copy !req
1154. - Good night, a very good
night, customers are very happy,Copy !req
1155. kitchen on fire, did a
fucking good job tonight.Copy !req
1156. Alan, I just hope he seriously,
yeah,Copy !req
1157. picks this up and runs with
it and puts everything into itCopy !req
1158. because look at it, a
great area, great produce,Copy !req
1159. on the beach, what more
could you ask for?Copy !req
1160. Two months later and I'm feeling
peckish for some seafood.Copy !req
1161. I'm back in BrightonCopy !req
1162. to meet up with the right
honourable Alan Love.Copy !req
1163. I hope this guy is no
longer in denial,Copy !req
1164. he is a showbiz luvvie,
he's got a heart of gold,Copy !req
1165. but can he run a business?Copy !req
1166. I've heard they're
selling take-away,Copy !req
1167. so I'm going to order
some incognito.Copy !req
1168. - Good afternoon,
Love's fish restaurant,Copy !req
1169. how can I help?Copy !req
1170. - I'd like to orderCopy !req
1171. a couple of portions of
fish and chips please,Copy !req
1172. the name is Jimmy.Copy !req
1173. Okay, two portions of
fish and chips take-away.Copy !req
1174. Can't wait to see this,
here we go.Copy !req
1175. Can I catch the unsuspecting
chefs napping again?Copy !req
1176. Right, I'll just go
and see whereCopy !req
1177. Jimmy's fish and chips are?Copy !req
1178. - Gordon
- How are you, man?Copy !req
1179. - Hello how are you?Copy !req
1180. - Good man good.Copy !req
1181. - Yeah, good
to see you well.Copy !req
1182. Gentlemen, how are you doing?Copy !req
1183. - Busy, busy, busy.
- Yeah, good.Copy !req
1184. - Fish and chips, mad.Copy !req
1185. - Talking about fish and chips,Copy !req
1186. I fucking ordered them
20 minutes ago,Copy !req
1187. two portions for Jimmy.Copy !req
1188. Did the order come through?Copy !req
1189. - That'll do?
- Good, yes please.Copy !req
1190. - I thought it was you.Copy !req
1191. - Did you ring up and say you
were Jimmy yeah, on the phone?Copy !req
1192. - Jimmy, I'm
looking for two portionsCopy !req
1193. of fish and chips.Copy !req
1194. - I put the order
through five minutes ago.Copy !req
1195. - Alex's day off?Copy !req
1196. - He's gone, how long waiting?Copy !req
1197. - He's what?
- He's gone.Copy !req
1198. - How long has
he been gone?Copy !req
1199. - Two days after you left.Copy !req
1200. - Why?Copy !req
1201. - He couldn't change.Copy !req
1202. We had customers coming in
11.30, take-away fish and chips.Copy !req
1203. Fuck off, I'm not ready,
make them fucking waitCopy !req
1204. 'til 12 o'clock, we're not open.Copy !req
1205. - You fired him?Copy !req
1206. - Between me and Alan,
Alan had the last say,Copy !req
1207. but I wanted him to go, so.Copy !req
1208. - Alan fired somebody?Copy !req
1209. - He's a hard bastard now.Copy !req
1210. - Alex is
back in France,Copy !req
1211. he claims he leftCopy !req
1212. because he couldn't accept
the lower paid position.Copy !req
1213. Love's has been rammed
since its launch.Copy !req
1214. - How are you?
- How are you buddy?Copy !req
1215. Something's changed,
you look well.Copy !req
1216. - Well, it's been, success
is a wonderful thing,Copy !req
1217. it makes you feel so
much better.Copy !req
1218. - And the situation
with the house,Copy !req
1219. have you managed to
take it off the market?Copy !req
1220. - I haven't actually, I got an
offer on it which I accepted.Copy !req
1221. - Really?Copy !req
1222. - Only at the moment I
can't really afford it.Copy !req
1223. - He may not have
saved his home,Copy !req
1224. but Alan's tripled his turnover,Copy !req
1225. Love's takes 14 grand a weekCopy !req
1226. with Alan its star attraction.Copy !req
1227. And you probably
recognise these don't you?Copy !req
1228. - Well, they used to have my
name on the back years ago.Copy !req
1229. - We can come down hereCopy !req
1230. from time to time and reminisce.Copy !req
1231. - Yeah.Copy !req
1232. - Did you seriously used
to have your nameCopy !req
1233. on the back of your chair?Copy !req
1234. That's incredible.Copy !req
1235. - I love you, that's.Copy !req
1236. - What sort of logo, Alan Love,
star.Copy !req
1237. So when you are thinking
of sliding backCopy !req
1238. to those old fucking
crony ways again, yeah,Copy !req
1239. get your chair out my son.Copy !req
1240. - Role, when
you're ready Mr. Demille.Copy !req
1241. - That fucking
batter looks lovely.Copy !req
1242. And still, yeah,
nice and crispy.Copy !req
1243. Which for a take-away
is quite unique.Copy !req
1244. I have to say it's
fucking delicious, yeah?Copy !req
1245. It's good.Copy !req
1246. I was gonna go skint and
probably within six monthsCopy !req
1247. I would have been absolutely
flat broke, no house,Copy !req
1248. no money, no business,
that would have gone.Copy !req
1249. - Well, it's really
refreshing to hearCopy !req
1250. you're fighting for the
business now.Copy !req
1251. - It is a dream,Copy !req
1252. the dream is to take
the brand name further.Copy !req
1253. - Truthfully, in denial stillCopy !req
1254. or running a business?Copy !req
1255. - Running a business,
absolutely.Copy !req
1256. - You're going
to keep it that way?Copy !req
1257. - You know that.Copy !req
1258. - Ladies and gentlemen,Copy !req
1259. - Is there any
point to this.Copy !req
1260. - Thank you
for coming this evening.Copy !req
1261. Did you enjoy dinner?Copy !req
1262. - Yes.Copy !req
1263. - Excellent.Copy !req
1264. Yeah, this man's happy
and he's got every reasonCopy !req
1265. to be happy.Copy !req
1266. The restaurant's consistent,Copy !req
1267. it's using sustainable fishCopy !req
1268. and it's become a
phenomenal local eatery.Copy !req
1269. And for the first time everCopy !req
1270. Alan Love is now
running his business,Copy !req
1271. his business is not running him.Copy !req
1272. So fucking good news,
I'm really happy.Copy !req
1273. Fucking hell, thank
fuck I can't sing.Copy !req
1274. There's no business like show
business, my fucking arse.Copy !req
1275. Oh, dear.Copy !req