1. Long ago,
in a distant land,
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2. I, Aku, the shape-shifting
master of darkness,
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3. unleashed an unspeakable evil.
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4. But a foolish samurai warrior
wielding a magic sword,
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5. stepped forth to oppose me.
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6. Before the final blow
was struck,
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7. I tore open a portal in time
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8. and flung him into the future,
where my evil is law.
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9. Now the fool seeks to return
to the past
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10. and undo the future that is Aku.
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11. tickets, please!
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12. Tickets!
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13. Can you not see I'm trying to get a tan,
you gall-dern...
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14. Is this a full-service boat or what?
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15. I need me a refreshment!
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16. Uh, like,
here's your refreshment, sir.
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17. Thanks, laddie!
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18. Um, you're, like, totally welcome, sir.
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19. Gross!
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20. It's you, me old friend!
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21. Ah, it's grand to see you!
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22. Never would I expect such a thing.
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23. You and me, a caber toss away
on the same boat.
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24. I see you changed your wardrobe.
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25. Got tired of wearing
your granny's jammies, did you?
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26. Uh, like, you must be confused.
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27. My name's Brent Worthington.
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28. What kind of a name is Brent?
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29. Brent is what you call a sword
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30. after you hit a rock with it
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31. or after my wife sits on it.
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32. only don't go telling her that.
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33. You know how mad she gets.
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34. Uh, I don't know
what you're talking about.
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35. Like, I just work here.
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36. You're funny! You work here!
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37. I don't know you, mister.
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38. That's right.
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39. Work here!
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40. What... Huh?
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41. What did you say, laddie?
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42. Like, you have me mistaken
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43. for, like, somebody totally else.
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44. Hey, waterboy, over here!
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45. Hey, pal, water!
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46. Look me in the eyes and tell me
you're not Samurai Jack.
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47. Like, I'm not Samurai Jack.
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48. Some slimy, toothy goat took your brain!
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49. - Did Aku do this?
- Who?
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50. Where's your sword?
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51. Did Aku get your sword?
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52. What sword?
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53. You remember your sword, don't you?
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54. Your sword, your soul,
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55. That wee bit of enchanted steel
that's supposed to save the planet.
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56. Like, I don't believe in weapons.
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57. You're the greatest warrior
that's ever lived, besides me.
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58. You don't just up
and go soft and mushy on me.
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59. You've mastered countless
fighting styles and weapons.
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60. You're the defender of truth, freedom,
and talking dogs.
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61. Armies fear you.
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62. There's no stopping you
once you get cooking.
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63. Everyone's looking for you.
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64. There's a huge price on your head.
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65. Oh, yeah, you're Samurai Jack, all right,
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66. And I can prove it!
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67. Hey, you!
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68. Yeah, you, tiny.
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69. Would you be looking for Samurai Jack?
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70. Yes.
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71. Well, who's that?
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72. Samurai Jack.
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73. Oh, ho ho!
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74. You're in for it now, buddy.
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75. Go on, teach this Neanderthal
with bad breath a lesson.
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76. Twist his arm and make him dance
like an alligator on hot coals.
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77. Me buddy!
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78. Did you see the looks on their faces?
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79. Just like old times, eh, old buddy?
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80. Oh, yeah.
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81. Uh, what happened?
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82. You lost a fight.
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83. What? I don't remember being in a fight.
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84. Must have been sun glare.
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85. That would make sense.
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86. You were blinded, happened to me once.
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87. I've got a bad feeling about this.
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88. Fish men.
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89. I don't like fish men.
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90. Hold on, laddie.
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91. This could get rough.
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92. Too tight, too tight!
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93. What's with all the bubbles?
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94. Dude, it's, like, the way they talk.
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95. They, like, heard an explosion.
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96. Now, they're all blowing bubbles!
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97. Um, like, this guy
who looks exactly like me
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98. was, like, on this boat passing over
their undersea kingdom, right?
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99. And they, like, asked this guy for help.
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100. Okay, so, I guess he, like,
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101. totally freed them from Aku's minions,
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102. So, like, they owe this guy,
who looks exactly like me, everything.
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103. But he, like, got back on his boat
and, like, continued on his way,
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104. And they, like,
never got a chance to thank him.
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105. Oh, like, don't salute me.
I'm not the guy.
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106. See, I told you!
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107. Even fish men know you're Jack.
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108. Like, I'm not Samurai Jack,
fish man. Okay?
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109. Shut it!
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110. What'd you do,
bump your head or something?
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111. What?
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112. No, wait, where do you...
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113. Oh.
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114. Okay, well, like,
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115. thanks for the ride and everything.
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116. I'll see you later.
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117. Nice try, twinkle toes.
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118. You're with me.
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119. I have to retrace your steps
and find out how you lost your brain,
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120. Not to mention finding your sword.
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121. Um, can I have, like, a moment here, okay?
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122. I mean, this is, like,
way too much for me to take in.
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123. Of course, of course.
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124. Take all the time you want.
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125. I'm just trying to find your lost brain!
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126. And when I find it,
I'll stuff it back in your cranium
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127. So, you can finally remember who you are!
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128. - Get me?
- Well, like...
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129. How are you going to find it
if it's, like, lost?
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130. Wait. I need just one lead,
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131. a clue.
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132. Now, shut up and let me think!
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133. Gah! You don't have to be, like, so rude.
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134. - A scar!
- Scar? Like, what scar?
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135. Still fresh, too.
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136. There is only one creature alive
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137. that can make a mark like that,
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138. the tango beast.
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139. It's a doozy!
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140. And I know-just where to find it.
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141. Tango beast territory.
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142. This is where you fought the beast.
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143. Look familiar?
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144. No! I've told you.
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145. Look, okay, like, I'm sure this guy
is, like, real cool and everything,
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146. but you have got the wrong guy.
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147. Like, I'm Brent, okay?
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148. Humor me.
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149. We just have to reenact the fight
to find another clue.
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150. Like, you're going to fight it?
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151. No, you daft man, you are!
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152. What? As if!
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153. You don't even know if it's in there.
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154. If there's one thing this creature hates
more than any other thing
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155. it's the stench of
the wily Jubb-Jubb plant.
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156. Just a whiff can send it into a frenzy.
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157. Do you recognize this man?
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158. Oh, yeah. I remember him well.
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159. Yeah, really, really straightened me out.
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160. - Out with it!
- Okay, okay! Just don't hurt me!
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161. All right. It was a few moons ago, okay?
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162. I-I-I was terrorizing this town
until one night, he came along and, uh...
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163. Well, we had a, you know, a confrontation.
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164. And he beat me,
and then, we started talking,
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165. and he showed me the root of my problem,
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166. that I was attacking the village
to make myself feel better,
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167. to compensate for a lack of self-esteem.
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168. You're playing with me, tango.
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169. No, no, it's the truth.
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170. I feel great now.
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171. I got my old job back, I'm going out more.
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172. I wash.
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173. Which way did he go?
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174. Like, what happened?
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175. You fainted!
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176. Tango's stench must have overwhelmed you.
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177. That's logical.
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178. Happened to me once.
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179. What?
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180. Sandal tracks.
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181. Sandals? Ugh!
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182. You wear sandals.
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183. - Like, never!
- Shut it!
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184. Heck's Bucket sea port.
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185. You will never find
a more retched hive of scum and villainy,
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186. and the crab cakes aren't bad, either.
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187. Ugh! Gross!
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188. It makes perfect sense you'd come here.
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189. - Uh, I don't think so.
- Shut it!
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190. Really disgusting worms for sale!
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191. Ugh!
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192. Hey, hey, barbecued lizard on a stick!
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193. Uh! Freak!
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194. Have you seen him here before?
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195. No.
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196. Hmm.
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197. Hey! You seen him before?
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198. You seen him?
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199. How about you?
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200. You?
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201. You?
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202. You?
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203. You?
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204. You? You?
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205. You guys?
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206. You? You?
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207. You? You?
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208. You?
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209. Can we go now?
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210. Now, that's what I'm talking about!
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211. Has anybody seen this man before?
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212. Right.
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213. Now, now, boys,
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214. I was just trying to clear something up.
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215. It's a long story.
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216. Let's just put the guns down
and have a cup of tea.
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217. I guess you don't like tea.
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218. Fine.
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219. How about six feet of blazing steel?
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220. What's that, laddie?
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221. I hear you, buddy.
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222. These stupid blokes
ain't worth dulling my sword on.
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223. Time to finish with a bang, aye!
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224. Hey, you want to hear a story?
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225. Does it look like my bedtime?
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226. No, no, no. It's a great story.
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227. You never heard it before.
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228. It's epic, amazing!
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229. It's got action, drama, tragedy,
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230. ghosts, irony, repentance,
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231. gambling, death, questionable ethics,
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232. and an albatross and the walking dead!
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233. And the best part is it's all true.
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234. I'll tell you a story
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235. about the old man who got in my way,
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236. and it's not a happy ending.
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237. - It'll just take a second.
- No!
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238. - Let me tell you the title.
- All right.
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239. The Rime of the Ancient Mariner.
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240. I've heard it!
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241. I don't care
if you think it is interesting!
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242. Gosh, you're, like, really, really old.
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243. Hey! I remember you!
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244. - Come back for a repeat performance?
- What?
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245. You've seen him before?
He's been here before?
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246. Yeah! It was a while ago.
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247. He was looking to hire a boat out of here
for a long journey, somewhere far.
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248. I don't know.
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249. And he liked my story!
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250. As if.
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251. Look, I don't remember you
or your story, okay?
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252. Like, I'm so sure.
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253. Great, it'll be like new!
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254. The Rime of the Ancient Mariner!
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255. Nope, we're gone.
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256. Wait, stay here and listen
to the nightmares of the sea!
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257. All right.
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258. One more time, but slow.
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259. We're here.
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260. The lines here are regular shipping lanes,
well-established routes of travel.
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261. He could have gone on any of these.
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262. Hmm.
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263. Where would, let's say, fish men live?
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264. Well, their kingdom is located here
under the sea.
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265. What's right above it?
"The great unknown"?
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266. I don't know, it's the great unknown.
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267. We'll sail there.
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268. Like, no way.
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269. It's uncharted waters, dangerous.
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270. They say pirates, magic,
mystery, and death run rampant out there.
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271. No one returns.
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272. My friend here,
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273. he returned from there.
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274. And that's where we're going!
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275. Like, didn't you hear the man?
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276. It's not a tropical paradise.
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277. - It's spooky, and I don't like spooky—
- Shut it!
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278. Is she a fast ship?
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279. She's fast enough for you, Scots-man.
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280. - Where are you headed?
- The great unknown.
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281. Ooh!
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282. Uh, that's the real trick, isn't it?
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283. And it's going to cost you,
10,000, in advance.
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284. Like, 10,000?
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285. Dude, we could, like,
almost buy our own ship for that.
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286. Dude, I know this guy—
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287. Yeah, but who's going to
sail it, kid? You?
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288. Well, like, yeah. I could.
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289. I've worked on a boat before.
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290. That'll do you.
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291. Ooh!
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292. All right, then. All aboard.
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