Space Ghost Coast to Coast 4x10

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While attempting to introduce Jon Stewart to the wonders of aroma therapy, Moltar accidentally cuts off his oxygen.

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1. - And then Grimlock the Toy Maker came charging over the hill

2. with his evil horde of baby drankenwats.

3. - Uh huh. So I look at him and I say

4. "You don't want to mess with me Grimlock!

5. "I'll use my heat ray!"

6. - I'll use my heat ray? - Yeah.

7. "I'll use my heat ray."

8. - What? What?

9. - You could've used a better line. - Yeah!

10. - Really? Like what?

11. - Um, well something like, uh, "Don't toy with me, Toy Maker!"

12. - Yeah, or "These babies need changing!"

13. - And then kick his butt! - Oh, you mean something like,

14. "It's time to pick up your toys, Toy Maker!

15. "Your room is a mess!

16. "I mean, look at it."

17. - What kinda line is that?

18. - You wanna defeat him or kiss him?

19. - Wait. Here's a good one.

20. "I'm going to lock you up, Grimlock!"

21. - You're pathetic.

22. - Wait, where are you guys going?

23. Hey, wait! Guys! I know I'm able to do this.

24. How about, "Watch it, Toy Maker. Someone's gonna trip on those

25. "babies ones day, and fall down the steps.

26. "Then you'll feel bad.

27. "Toy Maker."

28. - Idiot.

29. Hello, and how do folks, this is Tansut,

30. America's favorite intergalactic ne'er-do-well,

31. welcoming you to Space Ghost Coast to Coast.

32. Tonight, Space Ghost yucks it up

33. with funny man Jon Stewart,

34. and, who knows, maybe a certain green someone

35. might get his butt blasted. Butt blasted. Ha!

36. Well take that, Tansut!

37. - And that! And that! - Ooh, I'm sorry!

38. - Now keep reading. You're doing great. - I'm sorry! I didn't mean it that way!

39. Welcome to the show!

40. Greetings! I'm Space Ghost.

41. Jon Stewart's here. Zorak is over there.

42. Is that it? - Yes.

43. - Jon, are you into aroma therapy? - Yeah.

44. - Well then let me introduce you to the exotic fragrances of East India.

45. - Sure.

46. - Jon, picture a camel, if you will,

47. traipsing across the desert sands.

48. Uhh, hold on.

49. Jon... I accidentally unhooked your oxygen.

50. Sorry. - Oh man. We're screwed!

51. - Don't panic!

52. - What're we gonna do?

53. - Hold your breath for ten seconds.

54. Oh, just...?

55. - My guest tonight is a fellow talk show host.

56. A fine comedian and a good buddy of mine.

57. Ladies and gentleman, please welcome

58. Jon Stewart!

59. Jon? Hello?

60. - Jon, hang on!

61. I'll revive you with my new electro-lever.

62. - That was ten seconds?

63. Great galaxies, man! Are you on some kind of a bender?

64. - Sorry. Sorry about that.

65. - You're okay, right? - Yep.

66. Here we go.

67. - My word. - Yep, that's fixed.

68. - What is Hollywood doing to our children?

69. - You know, the physical gags never really work.

70. - Sure they do!

71. - Yeah, that's true. Eh, okay.

72. That didn't hurt. - Thank you

73. for being on our little show citizen Jon.

74. - Thank you! Thank you for having me.

75. I'm very excited to be here.

76. - You're a fellow talk show host. Do you have any advice for me?

77. - Always introduce yourself to the guest before the show.

78. That way, you know,

79. they'll know who's hosting it. - I'm hosting it!

80. Space Ghost!

81. Well, I was thinking you'd come into my dressing room and introduce yourself

82. - Oh. - Then I realized

83. we're on different planets and it's really hard.

84. I... my sister called.

85. - But I was trying to do that. You walk up.

86. Yeah. - And if you have Claudia Schiffer on

87. don't mention the word cheese cause she freaks.

88. - Wow that's good!

89. Moltar, make a note of that. - No.

90. - C'mon... - I'm busy.

91. - Are you... - No!

92. - We'll make a note of it.

93. Jon, do you have problems with sidekicks?

94. - No. - Really? How come?

95. - Can't afford one. - Just capture one!

96. Right, Zorak?

97. - Sidekicks are good at kicking. Zorak.

98. - May I kick you, Jon?

99. - Are you serious? - Zorak, settle down!

100. - I'll kick your kidneys out and then make a pie with 'em.

101. Zorak!

102. - Serve it to ya while you're still alive.

103. - You're not making a pie and that's that!

104. That's what I'll do. - Where were we?

105. Sidekicks.

106. What do you think they should do on a show?

107. - The sidekick is there to, seriously,

108. to pipe down, not say anything.

109. - I like that!

110. Moltar, Make a note of that!

111. I can't hear you.

112. Breaking up. - Quit it.

113. You're doing that with your mouth. - What? what's that?

114. Can't hear ya.

115. Okay, we're clear for two.

116. Anybody need anything?

117. - I'd like some water, please.

118. - That was some funny stuff. Loved the kidney thing.

119. - Yeah, well... I wasn't kidding about that.

120. - Yeah, well, that Zorak, he's...

121. He's pretty funny when he gets all worked up.

122. - Just keep on keepin' on. You're doing a great job.

123. Love the work.

124. - Who asked you?

125. 01:20.

126. You need anything Space Ghost?

127. - Do I have time for a hot pastrami?

128. - 01:10? I kinda doubt it.

129. - See what you can do.

130. - Do you like a good pastrami sandwich?

131. - Oh boy. Man, do I. Minute to go.

132. - What do ya have on it?

133. - Oh, just a little mayon... I mean... mustard.

134. - You almost said mayonnaise Space Ghost!

135. 45 seconds.

136. You almost said mayonnaise on pastrami Space Ghost.

137. - No I didn't. I said mustard.

138. - Wow.

139. Oh.

140. Space Ghost.

141. - I said mustard. 30 seconds.

142. - I'm sorry? I missed that.

143. - Well mustard is what I said.

144. - Really?

145. 20 seconds.

146. - You're calling me a liar, aren't you Stewart?

147. - Maybe.

148. Fifteen.

149. Ten seconds.

150. Get ready.

151. five, four, three...

152. - Am I gonna get that sandwich or no... two

153. - We're back with close personal friend and talk show compadre

154. Jon Stewart! - I wanted to,

155. you know, I feel stupid about this. - Mhmm.

156. - Just get some advice on, like,

157. you know, talk shows and stuff. I mean...

158. you're the man. - Wait a minute.

159. Now you want advice from me?

160. - Absolutely I'm looking for advice from you!

161. Big man, leotards, musc... Sure!

162. - Here that, Moltar?

163. I've got musk.

164. - You don't have musk!

165. I sure do.

166. Manly space musk!

167. - You smell like a farm!

168. - You should stay in touch, Jon.

169. We may have a vacancy in the control room

170. very soon. Look, I'm not desperate.

171. I just... yeah, you know, I mean,

172. you can throw me a bone.

173. You know what I'm sayin'? - Sure.

174. - I don't eat much. - Bones are cheap.

175. - I would just hang very quietly. I'd write for you.

176. I'd do whatever. Sweep up. Uh-huh.

177. - I just need experience.

178. - By cracky, I'll start you at courtesy clerk!

179. Can you clean up the spill on aisle nine?

180. - I hope.

181. There's room for advancement, right?

182. - Oh, yeah. Head courtesy clerk then cashier.

183. - It's up to you guys. Use me as you wish.

184. Join the band.

185. I got kind of, like, a tambourine situation happening.

186. - Tambourine?

187. - Tambourine, phooey.

188. - When did you start talking?

189. - Just this minute, big boy.

190. - Huh. Weird.

191. - You need a shave.

192. - Who, me?

193. - No, Jonny boy. - Stay out of it!

194. - I had a beard.

195. - But you don't now?

196. - No. I'll tell you what,

197. you wanna know why talk shows don't have beards? - Tell me.

198. - Cause Mike Douglas won't let us.

199. - Really? And just who is this Mike Douglas?

200. - He's in charge of all the talk show hosts.

201. He calls, and if you have a...

202. - I had facial hair. Uh huh.

203. - And I was forced to shave it.

204. - So Mike Douglas is a stickler for facial hair?

205. - Does he write you, too? - No, he doesn't!

206. - You know the advice that I have for you,

207. and this is something that Mike Douglas told me

208. - Wait! Let me guess!

209. Work extra hard when your guests have hangovers?

210. - Always open with a number. - Huh.

211. - People love it. - Zorak, eh, number,

212. what do ya think?

213. - Yeah, okay.

214. - Just come out. Pow. Pow.

215. Hittem' with something from Kismet, Oklahoma!

216. They go crazy.

217. - Mike Douglas is a bonified genius!

218. - Then you bring out, I don't know,

219. Suzanne Pleshette, and the whole thing takes off.

220. - I am seeing things for the first time.

221. - I'm here to help! I'm here.

222. I'm tellin' you, if we get together Space Ghost

223. we can make a big thing. - Mhmm.

224. - I have a little thing, you have a bigger thing,

225. but together

226. we could take... - Everything

227. down a notch Jon?

228. Because I'd really like to take everything down a notch.

229. If I may.

230. Yeah, there's a lot of beautiful people here tonight.

231. I see some beautiful people here.

232. And right here.

233. Hi.

234. But, you know,

235. life as a super hero, ladies and gentleman, can be stressful.

236. I've flown all over the galaxy

237. but I always come back to a special place

238. in my heart.

239. It's a place called home.

240. This one's for me mum.

241. Oh man. We're screwed!

242. Ooh, I'm sorry!