The Boys 5x8

1. Scorched-earth.

2. Shock and awe.

3. Blood and bone.

4. In the end...

5. ...only one of us left standing.

6. Too fucking right.

7. Easter is just around the corner.

8. How perfect would it be for your Second Coming

9. to come on the day of Jesus's Resurrection.

10. You got the president killed.

11. I didn't have a choice.

12. It's over. You will never hear from me ever again.

13. She's using you!

14. - You're throwing us away... - You shut the fuck up!

15. ...for a woman who thinks you're pathetic! Kevin!

16. You step one foot in the water anywhere,

17. we're gonna kill you!

18. Why would Homelander be bringing together

19. the world's most dangerous psychics?

20. Literal thought police.

21. There is no room for heresy.

22. I really did care. I was just like you.

23. Be the annoying, Goody Two-shoes asshole that you are.

24. - What do you want? - Your help.

25. You see, Billy

26. had no conscience.

27. He will ask you to pull him back.

28. But the truth of the matter is, is that you are fucked when you get in his way.

29. 'Cause anyone who's ever loved you, you end up getting 'em killed, don't you?

30. I set the Doppler system on the roof to detect unexplained objects.

31. Frenchie. Frenchie.

32. Thank you for saving me.

33. Mon coeur, you saved me.

34. No. No.

35. No.

36. "I, Serge Emilien Les Saintes,

37. being of unsound mind and haggard body,

38. declare this my last will and testament.

39. Though I have no worldly possessions to bequeath.

40. But as I compose this letter on cardstock smuggled into the Freedom Camp,

41. within the a... nus

42. of a rotund guard with colitis named Burt,

43. I am reminded that I do have something to give you--

44. the knowledge that I've seen each and every one of your assholes."

45. Excuse me?

46. It says what it says.

47. Um, "Butcher, I installed a toilet cam once, purely for science--

48. long story-- and inadvertently captured yours.

49. Hughie and M.M., as we were bent over and searched

50. for contraband in the camp. Annie, I accidently

51. walked in on you and Hughie plumbing each other's depths,

52. but you did not notice me." I-I am... I'm just gonna

53. - skip ahead. - Yeah, that's a good idea.

54. "Some refer to it as a mud dungeon..."

55. "Chestnut balloon knot."

56. Okay. Okay.

57. All right, he drew... he drew sketches.

58. This is mostly asshole-related, but, um, okay, yeah.

59. I think he's getting to his point. Um,

60. "We've been through so much together,

61. the best and worst of times.

62. And I've become closer to all of you than my own blood.

63. So close that I've seen all your assholes.

64. And that, to me, is a true mark of family.

65. You are my family.

66. I cannot know if I will have wiped my own slate

67. clean enough to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

68. But fear not. I am at peace,

69. because for a moment, I knew Heaven on Earth.

70. In your arms, mon coeur."

71. Here's to the mavericks.

72. The radicals.

73. The revolutionaries.

74. Because the ones strong enough to change the world

75. are the ones who usually do.

76. Easter Sunday, 4:00 p.m. live from the White House.

77. Homelander reboots the universe.

78. Streaming on VoughtBook, VoughtTube...

79. It's all right.

80. I'm not here to hurt you.

81. - You mean like last time? - Look at you.

82. No harm done.

83. How'd you find me?

84. Crime Analytics caught wind of a young man flying outside Kolvereid.

85. Tends to draw attention.

86. I don't want your help.

87. I know. You've made that very clear.

88. But you're also the son of God, and you should not be sleeping in a barn.

89. You can have a whole floor of the Tower,

90. do what you want with it, come and go as you please.

91. I don't want to be anywhere near you.

92. Everything is different now.

93. I've ascended.

94. - I'm immortal. - Then why do you give a shit

95. about what happens to me?

96. Because we're family.

97. We have the same blood pumping through our veins.

98. Yeah, well, you've got your shitty racist dad.

99. - So you don't need me. - No, Soldier Boy doesn't matter.

100. You and I, that's all that matters.

101. I know you,

102. because I am you.

103. And you're me.

104. Dad?

105. Get fucked.

106. I am nothing like you.

107. You were already the most powerful person on Earth.

108. And you were a lonely, miserable piece of fucking shit,

109. throwing tantrums when you didn't get what you want.

110. Why the fuck would more power make you any better?

111. It's just going to make you an even more lonely,

112. miserable piece of shit.

113. Scaring people into calling you God

114. doesn't make you God.

115. And deep down, you know that.

116. It's okay.

117. You don't know what's going on.

118. It's okay.

119. But you will.

120. She won't talk,

121. or she can't talk?

122. I don't know.

123. That girl's got a real, uh,

124. "I'm gonna rip your arm off and fist you with it" energy.

125. She's been through a lot.

126. What's Sage saying?

127. - Is there any sign the experiments worked? - Nope.

128. Which means Frenchie died for nothing.

129. All right, when you get to where you're going,

130. make sure you change that dressing out.

131. - Okay. - All right.

132. When are we leaving?

133. That's a good question.

134. I told you, we're not running.

135. I'm not asking you to run.

136. I'm asking you to save these people.

137. Save them from the guy whose hog

138. they were drooling to suck literally yesterday?

139. I bet Homelander has a weird dick.

140. We can do more.

141. - We want to do more. - Saving these people

142. is the best that any of us can do.

143. Just get them to Canada,

144. hook up with the rest of your team and keep helping people one at a time.

145. While you die on some suicide mission?

146. - Do you even have a plan? - I mean,

147. suicide versus Canada, it's a real horse race.

148. Am I right?

149. Gotcha. Earnest o'clock.

150. I'll fuck myself right out.

151. When I joined The Seven,

152. I was so excited to meet Queen Maeve.

153. But... never meet your heroes.

154. She was bitter, she was checked out, and she just...

155. She gave away so many parts of herself, there was nothing left.

156. And I was such an annoying little shit,

157. just running around, saying, "There's always something worth fighting for."

158. I swore to myself I would never let that happen to me.

159. But it did.

160. Not anymore.

161. I'm not on a suicide trip.

162. It's not a lost cause.

163. It's not even about winning. It's...

164. It's about keeping the light burning as long as we fucking can.

165. So thank you for being my annoying little shit.

166. I don't know about "never meet your heroes," by the way.

167. It worked out okay for me.

168. Happy anniversary,

169. Mr. First Gentleman.

170. I had it custom-made from turbine-grade titanium.

171. The straps are reinforced ballistic Kevlar.

172. - Mm. - No matter how much I defile you,

173. this one will never explode.

174. Oh, baby,

175. I lucked out when I arrange-married you.

176. Mmm.

177. Hmm.

178. - Oh. - You need more time?

179. Ain't enough time in the world for that one.

180. What's the problem?

181. Oh, don't get me wrong.

182. I am honored to be writing Homelander's speech,

183. heralding the coming of our new Lord.

184. But?

185. I guess I just didn't expect so many people would...

186. ...doubt...

187. Homelander's godhood.

188. You still have that '95 Chateau Margaux?

189. The one you took from that pedo-priest at Immaculate Conception?

190. Mm-hmm.

191. - Let's crack it open. - Great idea.

192. Look, I know you're pissed at me,

193. but I really need you right now.

194. What is he thinking?

195. If I press him, will he flip on Homelander?

196. Oh, for fuck's sake, is this the eighth grade?

197. So, all those people who are gonna doubt?

198. What if you did something about it?

199. What do you mean?

200. I think you know.

201. No, I don't.

202. Well...

203. I just mean, how can we help Homelander make the world believe?

204. I ponder that every day.

205. Mmm.

206. Yum.

207. When I was a little girl, I had this dog Peaches.

208. She died.

209. I was riding the school bus that ran her over.

210. So messy.

211. And I carried her collar with me for weeks.

212. Anything to remind me of the pet I loved so much.

213. That's what you're doing. Yeah?

214. You let everyone think that you were the stray, that Frenchie took you in,

215. when you know it was really the other way around.

216. He was your pet, your lapdog really.

217. Yeah, you strung him along, but you kept his leash tight,

218. 'cause you loved using him.

219. You got off on his devotion.

220. And just when it looked like he might move on

221. with someone else, you finally fucked him.

222. Anything to keep him from being happy.

223. When he would have done anything for you,

224. even throw his life away.

225. And you let him.

226. You wanted him to do it.

227. Oi. Oi.

228. Easy does it. Listen to me.

229. Soldier Boy has to be fucking fuming for his blast to work, all right?

230. I thought you might be the same, so we spilled a bit of tea on ya.

231. And it was nothing personal, God's honest.

232. "O, now, forever.

233. Farewell. Farewell the-the-the..." what?

234. Fuck are you on about?

235. Othello. I knew it by heart, but now, it's-it's... gone.

236. My brain was so loud, and now it's...

237. It worked?

238. I'm fucking stupid like you guys.

239. Thank you.

240. Cool. Cool.

241. Cool. So, we're all getting pretty irradiated right now, which is fun.

242. What matters is Frenchie did it.

243. - It works. - Yo, I did... stuff, too.

244. I mean, I knew

245. you'd make a bloody good weapon, but never

246. in my wildest did I think you'd be this good.

247. - So what's the plan? - Homelander's using Easter

248. to announce he's God Almighty,

249. so we know where he'll be and when.

250. And if it's anything like that Vought Studios shit,

251. soon as he's done, he's siccing his thought police on America.

252. - Millions of people are gonna die. - So just to state the obvious,

253. we're talking about breaking into the White House?

254. - Yeah. - And we have to assume

255. - Homelander knows we're coming. - No. I got it.

256. You wear disguises. You dress up like those...

257. those soldiers with the-the furry hats.

258. Shit. That's England.

259. Ignore me.

260. - And how do we get in? - Underground tunnel.

261. The off-the-books one that JFK used to shag Marilyn.

262. We have to imagine the secret presidential fuck-tunnels must be pretty secure.

263. True, but I still got the blueprints from last year

264. when we did protection for Singer.

265. Every door code, every entrance.

266. Smart.

267. So how about it, you lot?

268. One last go?

269. I'll take that as a yes?

270. Fuck no. Y'all are dumb as fucking shit.

271. Homelander's gonna kill you, and he'll find me, so,

272. the rest of the time I got,

273. I'm going to Harry Potter World in Orlando.

274. Who's with me?

275. Wands up, bitches. Sage out.

276. I'm a disruptor. I disrupt.

277. And I was thinking, why can't Starlighters work in my factory

278. as non-compensated employees?

279. So... slaves?

280. Homelander, I'm glad you're here.

281. I'd love to bend your ear about white fertility rates.

282. Oh, why don't you wait for us in the garden?

283. - We just need a moment. Right this way. - All right.

284. - Who the fuck is that? - Günter Van Ellis.

285. World's richest man.

286. Seventeen children? Amateur astronaut?

287. - So? - Well, he represents a consortium

288. of billionaires, and they have a-a few requests.

289. - I don't have time for this. - Well,

290. they are the ruling class of America.

291. To build your church, we'll need their support.

292. Is he a believer?

293. Are any of them?

294. Or are they just scared of me?

295. Even Thomas doubted.

296. With enough time, the gentlest water can wear down any stone. Patience--

297. Wherever you're going, get there faster.

298. I believe we should consider postponing.

299. - Out of the question. - You saw Butcher's lab.

300. If he managed to figure out Soldier Boy's blast,

301. or if there were even the slightest chance that he might render you powerless--

302. You think I'm afraid of William Butcher?

303. No. No. Of course not.

304. Of course not. And we've taken the necessary precautions.

305. We moved the venue here.

306. We just don't want any distractions on your blessed day.

307. And it will give me more time to do what I do best,

308. convert more souls to your righteous banner.

309. Your Eminence?

310. - Not now, Deep. - Not your call, Prophet Brohammad.

311. Look, you don't need The Seven anymore?

312. Genius move, as always, but I've been thinking.

313. What you do need is a Crusader.

314. Yeah, like one of those yoked knights from the olden days?

315. Crack some skulls, lay down your holy law.

316. Where did you learn about the Crusades?

317. Um, the Bible? Ever heard of it?

318. It's not in the Bible. Uh, let me guess.

319. - Indiana Jones? - What? No.

320. Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.

321. - That's not a documentary. - No shit, Sherlock.

322. What did you--?

323. He's an astronaut. I took him to space.

324. Now, listen to me.

325. I don't need anyone anymore.

326. - I don't need billionaires-- - I couldn't agree more, sir.

327. And I don't need perverted fish fuckers who debase themselves endlessly

328. for mere drops of my affection.

329. - Is that what you think of me? - Since the day we met.

330. I have never had less respect for anyone in my life.

331. In fact, Kevin, the only reason

332. that I haven't fucking killed you

333. is that I want you to feel deep in your heart

334. how truly worthless you really are.

335. Ah.

336. Are the psychics in place?

337. - Nationwide. - Good.

338. The second the live broadcast is over,

339. I want the wheat separated from the chaff.

340. Those who don't accept my truth will be the first to burn in my holy fire.

341. Smile, Father.

342. One way or another, it's going to be a beautiful day.

343. Yeah. Uh, Kimiko?

344. Butcher's wrong.

345. You are not just a weapon.

346. From the start, Frenchie saw who you were.

347. And because he saw it, we saw it.

348. Just because he's gone doesn't mean all that's gone, too.

349. All right, this should be a bit of a fuckin' laugh.

350. Come on, then.

351. You know what would be super fucking helpful right now,

352. is if you would talk to me, bitch.

353. - What was that? - Hmm?

354. Nothing.

355. I'm just super psyched to hear your speech, babe.

356. I'm sure you crushed it.

357. We're live

358. in five, four, three.

359. My fellow Americans...

360. Happy Easter.

361. A day commemorating Jesus, who, as we all know, was tortured,

362. stripped of his dignity and killed.

363. And that's all well and good.

364. But you're Americans.

365. You deserve a God who doesn't die.

366. A God who fights back.

367. A God you can believe in.

368. Well, today, I bring you good news.

369. Recently,

370. I was visited by, uh, an exquisite angel

371. bearing the gift of revelation.

372. Ooh, yep. Smells exactly how I thought

373. a secret fuck tunnel would smell.

374. As I bathed in her light,

375. her heavenly lips spilled

376. sweet truth into my ear,

377. and I was awakened to my true purpose.

378. Not just to be the world's greatest hero

379. but to save all humanity.

380. To be...

381. ...the Second Coming.

382. But in a way, really, I'm the First Coming.

383. America...

384. ...I am the Lord.

385. Your savior.

386. I am your God.

387. And as such,

388. I'm going to usher this world into a new, golden dawn.

389. An age in which your God moves among you,

390. seen and heard.

391. Your prayers are truly answered

392. when you visit homelander.church.

393. And all I ask for in return...

394. Madam President, there is a threat on the building.

395. A small group has infiltrated the tunnels.

396. It's Butcher and his team.

397. Don't worry, we're ready.

398. Take her to the secure facility.

399. ...all of which you'll find outlined in chapter two

400. of the Homelander Bible.

401. Hang about.

402. There weren't no door here on them blueprints.

403. No. That's new.

404. The fuck?

405. Hey, hey! Annie.

406. Annie, what's going on?

407. Fucking Supe dog whistle.

408. We have a Code 30. Shots fired.

409. Agent down.

410. Fuck my fucking life.

411. Madam President!

412. Hang on, okay?

413. Uh...

414. Right. Go right.

415. Fucking finally, you judgmental cunt.

416. Ah!

417. You gonna flick your clits all day? Get out of there!

418. Move!

419. Come on!

420. Hey, hey, hey, hey.

421. You okay?

422. Homelander's in the Oval Office.

423. Good. Lead the way.

424. Fuck no, he would rip my tits out through my vag.

425. But I'm sure you'll be fine.

426. It's that way.

427. Break a leg.

428. Uh, left.

429. Proud of you, bitch.

430. Shit.

431. You been crying?

432. No.

433. Starlight.

434. It was all a test.

435. Yes.

436. The universe is rewarding me for my loyalty,

437. just like Sean Connery rewarded Costner

438. at the end of Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.

439. Sweet Jesus, you're a moron.

440. I'm gonna kill you.

441. And then Homelander will finally see.

442. I got him.

443. Keep going.

444. I just want Butcher and the girl.

445. The rest of you can go in peace.

446. Hey, hey, no, no, no. We don't have time.

447. You have to get Kimiko to Homelander before he fucks off.

448. I got this.

449. Yeah, and how you gonna manage that?

450. That is an ANSUL IGS-300.

451. I mean, you have your thing, I have mine.

452. Oi.

453. Come on. This way!

454. Oi, this shite is diabolical.

455. Why are you doing this? Huh?

456. Risking your life

457. for a man who wouldn't even piss on you if you were on fire.

458. I'm his right-hand bro.

459. He'll piss on me whenever I want.

460. Listen, I know you're scared--

461. - I'm not scared of shit. - Deep?

462. Kevin.

463. I can see it in your eyes.

464. Homelander terrifies you.

465. But he sure as fuck doesn't respect you.

466. Don't you want to be free of it?

467. Of him?

468. That fucking mouth of yours.

469. This isn't about me.

470. Of course it is!

471. I used to have it all.

472. You know, power, respect,

473. a top 50 STARmeter on IMDbPro.

474. But all the bad shit started when you showed up!

475. I lost everything!

476. You made those fucked-up choices,

477. you ruined your own life.

478. You're not a fucking baby.

479. For once, take some responsibility for yourself.

480. No!

481. Fuck. There's no way out.

482. The fuck?

483. Where's Butcher?

484. I really need a new job.

485. I simply ask that you open your hearts

486. and put your faith in me.

487. Those who accept my truth will be welcomed

488. into a land of milk and honey.

489. For I am your Fa...

490. I am, uh...

491. But no matter what I do,

492. some of you people will never accept me into your hearts.

493. Never love me.

494. Never believe in me.

495. And to such heretics, I offer oblivion.

496. And those who seek to destroy me,

497. you will die the most horrible of deaths,

498. as befits your wickedness.

499. My reign will last forever,

500. and when this world is cold and dead,

501. I shall remain...

502. eternal.

503. God of the ashes.

504. Evening, cunts.

505. Daddy's home.

506. William.

507. I was starting to think you weren't going to hold up your end of our deal.

508. Uh-huh.

509. Scorched-earth?

510. Shame about the French one.

511. How's your little science experiment going without him?

512. Let's find out.

513. - Justice for Ambrosius! - Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck.

514. Oh, my God.

515. - Oh, my God. Shit. I'm so sorry. - Say her name!

516. Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck. Stay away from me!

517. Justice for Ambrosius!

518. Say her name!

519. Justice for Ambrosius!

520. I'm sorry!

521. Oh, shit. Ah!

522. Huh.

523. Blast the cunt!

524. No. No.

525. You little piece of shit.

526. Everyone dies, starting with you.

527. The fuck you waiting for? Now, goddamn it!

528. What is wrong?

529. I can't do it.

530. Why not?

531. The rage I'm supposed to feel.

532. It's not there.

533. I just feel sad.

534. Rage is not what makes you strong.

535. It has never been, mon coeur.

536. It has always been yours.

537. Hmm.

538. Shock and awe, my son.

539. Blood and fucking bone.

540. This... is for Frenchie.

541. Stop!

542. You owe me.

543. All the times I could've killed you

544. and I didn't?

545. I let you live.

546. I'll-I'll give you Vought.

547. I'll give you Vought.

548. All right? You can do whatever you want with it.

549. Okay?

550. I'll, I'll...

551. I... Becca.

552. You want your wife back?

553. I'll have a shape-shifter be her.

554. Just tell me.

555. I'll fucking suck your dick!

556. Please! I'll do anything.

557. You want me to eat shit? I'll eat your fucking shit.

558. I'll eat your fucking shit on live TV.

559. Madelyn, you promised me.

560. It's not real.

561. You... you can't fucking do this.

562. You can't fucking do this.

563. I am the Homelander.

564. No.

565. Nah, you ain't nothing.

566. And this...

567. ...this is for my Becca.

568. No, no...

569. I got you, kid.

570. Easy.

571. You all right?

572. All right.

573. Just take it easy.

574. {\an8}...confirmed that the shocking footage out of the White House is legitimate.

575. {\an8}Homelander, the world's most prominent superhero, was killed today

576. {\an8}after proclaiming himself a so-called god.

577. {\an8}I'll [bleep] suck your [bleep]!

578. {\an8}I'll eat your [bleep] [bleep] on live TV.

579. {\an8}...and Homelander was deeply unwell.

580. {\an8}I would like to thank the brave men and women of the CIA,

581. {\an8}who, on my direct orders, dealt with this terrifying threat to democracy.

582. {\an8}And to those of you speculating, I want to say no.

583. {\an8}I am not going to resign.

584. {\an8}I did absolutely nothing wrong.

585. {\an8}That was former President Ashley Barrett,

586. {\an8}who, by an unprecedented unanimous vote in Congress,

587. {\an8}was impeached this afternoon and immediately removed from office.

588. So ends the scandal-plagued tenure of America's first female president...

589. - Here you go. - Thank you.

590. My brother.

591. - Oh, nice one. - Ooh.

592. Can I try that?

593. You did good today, kid. Here you go.

594. I just wish Frenchie could have seen you.

595. He did.

596. Oh.

597. It tastes like dirty cock. Is this so rich men can taste dirty cock?

598. Mm-mm.

599. We'll be right back.

600. Listen, mate, uh...

601. There ain't nothing I can say to...

602. ...to make this any easier.

603. But you done what you had to do.

604. You done the right thing, all right?

605. Anyway...

606. we can put all this shite behind us now.

607. We ain't got no powers no more, we're just...

608. ...ordinary blokes.

609. We could find somewhere quiet.

610. Start again.

611. Just you, me and Terror.

612. I reckon your mum would've liked that.

613. I know what my dad was.

614. And it's better that he's gone.

615. But you're not a good person, either.

616. I didn't choose you over him.

617. I-I chose myself.

618. I'm sorry, but I...

619. I don't want a fresh start with you.

620. I want this to be the end.

621. Well, it's just you and me now, Terror.

622. Terror?

623. For too long, the worst behavior of superheroes has gone unchecked.

624. If my months of imprisonment at Homelander's hand

625. has taught me anything,

626. it's the need for a complete rethinking of our relationship with superheroes.

627. That's why I've agreed to return to Vought as its interim CEO.

628. - Motherfucker. - A steady hand

629. is just what our shareholders need in a time of crisis,

630. to start the process of rebuilding.

631. I believe Vought's greatest, most profitable days are ahead of it.

632. It's time for Vought to do some listening.

633. Hey, Butcher, I...

634. Sorry, buddy.

635. Traffic?

636. Yeah.

637. Accident on the bridge. Should have taken the tunnel.

638. I thought you might try to stop me.

639. But you shouldn't have come alone.

640. You should've brought a fucking army.

641. No. If you were gonna release the virus, you would have done it already.

642. Unless...

643. ...I'm waiting for all the Supe cunts to clock in for the day shift.

644. Not much point shooting spunk into an empty fucking building, now is there?

645. Okay, well, now I kind of wish I brought an army.

646. Where's the virus, Butcher?

647. I dumped it in the sprinkler tank.

648. Frenchie's idea, God rest the mad bastard.

649. All I got to do is pull this trigger,

650. and it rains kill juice on all 99 floors.

651. Shit will be worldwide within a couple of days.

652. Why?

653. I mean, we already won.

654. Won?

655. No, we just gave them a black eye.

656. As long as there's Vought, there'll be Supes,

657. and sooner or later, some cunt that's already out there

658. becomes the next Homelander, and you fucking know it.

659. No.

660. We need to end the whole bloody notion of Supes.

661. And we need to make it permanent.

662. I mean, you can see it, right?

663. This is it. This is the moment.

664. You dragged me through fucking hell... for this.

665. For now.

666. To be your... canary.

667. Or your Kessler.

668. Or Lenny.

669. But here's the thing, you don't need me for that.

670. You never did. It's already in you. I can see it.

671. You might have a broken fucking heart, but you have one.

672. You are not a monster, Butcher.

673. It just hurts to be human.

674. I'm sorry, mate.

675. Superheroes...

676. are done.

677. I can't let you do it.

678. Petit Hughie and his gun.

679. Takes some big bollocks to pull the trigger on a mate.

680. I will if I have to.

681. Nah.

682. You ain't got the--

683. Stay down.

684. I'm sorry. Um...

685. I didn't want to, I didn't want to do that.

686. Um...

687. I'm-I'm g... I'm gonna call an ambulance, okay?

688. I wouldn't bother.

689. It's all right, Hughie.

690. I gave you no choice. I...

691. I wasn't gonna stop.

692. All the blood...

693. ...and shite I put you through...

694. ...and none of it made a blind bit of difference.

695. Y-You stayed yourself...

696. ...no matter what I done.

697. Hey. Hey...

698. I don't know what to do.

699. You don't need to do anything.

700. You really are...

701. ...the spittin' of Lenny.

702. If Butcher were here, he'd probably give us shit for crying over him.

703. But I mean, he's dead,

704. so you know, fuck him.

705. I mean, he was nothing but flaws and bad choices.

706. But he never gave up hope

707. that he could stop Homelander, and then he actually did it.

708. Love him or hate him...

709. ...he made the world a safer place.

710. Which makes him a hero.

711. And I bet he's in hell right now

712. flashing that smile...

713. ...and kicking the fuck out of the devil.

714. Yeah. That's it.

715. I think it's good that he's next to my mom.

716. It's where he always wanted to be.

717. Bye.

718. Hughie.

719. Let's go, kid.

720. Are we really about to go to a--

721. Topless steak house in Reno?

722. Yes, we are.

723. I promised.

724. He would have liked this.

725. Definitely.

726. ♪ It's nine o'clock on a Saturday ♪

727. ♪ The regular crowd shuffles in ♪

728. ♪ There's an old man sitting next to me ♪

729. ♪ making love to his tonic and gin ♪

730. ♪ He says, "Son, can you play me a memory? ♪

731. ♪ I'm not really sure how it goes ♪

732. ♪ but it's sad and it's sweet ♪

733. ♪ and I knew it complete ♪

734. ♪ when I wore a younger man's clothes" ♪

735. ♪ Sing us a song, you're the piano man ♪

736. ♪ Sing us a song tonight ♪

737. ♪ Well, we're all in the mood for a melody ♪

738. ♪ and you've got us feeling all right ♪

739. Hello?

740. Hugh Campbell? It's Bob Singer.

741. Uh, Mr. President.

742. - Uh, hi. - Campbell,

743. the nation owes you and your team a huge debt.

744. But I'm gonna skip all the dick tickling, all right?

745. Uh, I certainly wouldn't want the president to t-tickle my dick, sir.

746. Vought is a clusterfuck right now.

747. All those V'd up nutjobs they cooked up are running loose, doing God knows what.

748. So we're putting the Bureau of Supe Affairs back on its feet.

749. We need someone to run it.

750. So, what do you say, son?

751. You'd be reporting directly to me.

752. That's...

753. Wow, uh, that's, uh...

754. That's an honor, sir. It's just, um...

755. ...no, thank you?

756. "No, thank you"?

757. I-I really appreciate the offer, it's just, I actually have my own...

758. ...start-up venture I'm working on.

759. Fucking private sector.

760. Offer stands if you change your mind.

761. Okay.

762. I got you ginger beer,

763. - ginger candies... - Mm-hmm.

764. - and... - Oh.

765. - saltines. - Saltines.

766. Give me the saltines.

767. So, what'd I miss?

768. Mm. I puked.

769. Um, and then I had to pee, but I got there a little bit too late.

770. And then I puked again.

771. And then my mom called.

772. And I assume that was the worst part?

773. Mm-hmm. She spent 30 minutes straight just bitching about us not getting married.

774. Look, we can go down to the courthouse right now if that's what you really want.

775. No, no, I can't, because these are the only shoes that fit me.

776. Hey.

777. I would 100% marry you in those.

778. 11-99 at Broadway and 96th.

779. Requesting nearest officer.

780. Ah, there's construction on the Parkway.

781. Backup's gonna be a minute.

782. You feeling up to it?

783. Yeah. But I'm not changing my shoes.

784. Mm.

785. Take care of your mom, Robin.

786. ♪ Sing us a song, you're the piano man ♪

787. ♪ Sing us a song tonight ♪

788. ♪ Well, we're all in the mood for a melody ♪

789. ♪ and you've got us feeling all right ♪

790. ♪ She says I'm okay ♪

791. ♪ I'm all right ♪

792. ♪ Though you have gone ♪

793. ♪ from my life ♪

794. ♪ You said that it would ♪

795. ♪ Now everything should ♪

796. ♪ be all right ♪

797. ♪ She says I'm okay ♪

798. ♪ I'm all right ♪

799. ♪ Though you have gone ♪

800. ♪ from my life ♪

801. ♪ You said that it would ♪

802. ♪ Now everything should ♪

803. ♪ be all right ♪

804. ♪ Yeah, should be all right ♪