1. Today is the test launch day for
the inaugural Sabre store.Copy !req
2. And I, Dwight Schrute I'm in
charge of the entire operation.Copy !req
3. If I can prove myself todayCopy !req
4. and the store
is a hit with the mediaCopy !req
5. and Nellie sees this,Copy !req
6. the vice presidency is mine.Copy !req
7. - Are you holding this chair?
- Yes.Copy !req
8. 'Cause I feel like
I'm gonna fall off.Copy !req
9. - Yes. Yes.
- I'm not wearingCopy !req
10. - the right shoes for this.
- We went over this, okay?Copy !req
11. Your tiny fingers
make the best knots.Copy !req
12. Hey, strangers.Copy !req
13. So stoked
for the Sabre store opening.Copy !req
14. Hey, my name's Tabitha.Copy !req
15. I'm camped out in front
of the Sabre storeCopy !req
16. so I can be first in line
for the new pyramid.Copy !req
17. Psst. It's me, Erin.Copy !req
18. Dwight had me pretend
to be a hipster to create hype,Copy !req
19. and it's working.Copy !req
20. There's already people
camped out behind me.Copy !req
21. Test launch day, people.Copy !req
22. Now, I would like
to fill you inCopy !req
23. on a little secret about meCopy !req
24. to inspire you today.Copy !req
25. Now, I know you probably
all thinkCopy !req
26. I'm this patrician goddess.Copy !req
27. But here's the truth.Copy !req
28. I was born in the little
working class town of Basildon,Copy !req
29. and until the age of 32,Copy !req
30. I talked like this,Copy !req
31. which was bloody horrendous,
innit?Copy !req
32. I came from dirt—Copy !req
33. No, lower than...Copy !req
34. What's lower than dirt?Copy !req
35. Loam, magma, mantle,
outer core, inner core.Copy !req
36. - Yeah, thank you.
- Loam.Copy !req
37. Bloody loam, I came from.Copy !req
38. I hit rock bottom.Copy !req
39. When I auditioned
for the Spice Girls,Copy !req
40. I didn't even get a callback.Copy !req
41. I never stood a chance.Copy !req
42. Okay.Copy !req
43. Now, think about
my journey here today,Copy !req
44. and let it inspire
your journey.Copy !req
45. Okay.
Nellie, thank you.Copy !req
46. - Thank you so much.
- Yep.Copy !req
47. Today is press day,Copy !req
48. and press is gonna make
or break this store.Copy !req
49. And for a tech company,
press can only mean one thing—Copy !req
50. Bloggers.Copy !req
51. Dossier on bloggers.Copy !req
52. Bloggers are gross,
bloggers are obese.Copy !req
53. Bloggers have halitosis.Copy !req
54. You're gonna love 'em.Copy !req
55. Ryan is going to be
the main event today.Copy !req
56. He is the pitchman
who is going to giveCopy !req
57. the feisty, yet profound speechCopy !req
58. worthy of a world's fair.Copy !req
59. Ryan, you ready to do this?Copy !req
60. When people
see this presentation,Copy !req
61. they're gonna
in their pants.Copy !req
62. - Okay.
- Come on, man.Copy !req
63. Seriously disgusting.Copy !req
64. Cathy, you will be the hot
girl who talks to bloggers.Copy !req
65. Ugh.
Kill me.Copy !req
66. That was my idea.Copy !req
67. Packer, you will be
the sexual predatorCopy !req
68. who has come to prey
on the trendy teenage girlsCopy !req
69. who are obsessed
with the pyramid.Copy !req
70. - Uh...
- Uh...Copy !req
71. That is excellent.Copy !req
72. I don't see what that gets us,
but I'm a team player.Copy !req
73. Perfect casting, right?Copy !req
74. Schrute's out to get me.Copy !req
75. But I'm playing the long game.Copy !req
76. As soon as he messes up,Copy !req
77. I swoop in like
a sexual predator.Copy !req
78. I want to create
a sense of wonderCopy !req
79. and enthusiasmCopy !req
80. as if, at the end of ET,
candy poured out of the screen.Copy !req
81. Do you understand?Copy !req
82. I wanna get goose pimples.Copy !req
83. Speaking of pimples,Copy !req
84. let's release the bloggers!Copy !req
85. Morning, everyone.Copy !req
86. Oh, Andy, guess what
happened to me this morning?Copy !req
87. Don't care.
Tell me later.Copy !req
88. Listen, it's important.
You've gotta hear this.Copy !req
89. What do you got?Copy !req
90. - Oh, my God.
- Do you have a black eye?Copy !req
91. Yes, I do, Phyllis.Copy !req
92. I woke up at 4:00 A.M.
by accident,Copy !req
93. in time for the paper
to be delivered.Copy !req
94. Guess what.Copy !req
95. It's not a kid on a bike.
It's a man in a car.Copy !req
96. Andy, who punched you?Copy !req
97. Hey, I was on the can.Copy !req
98. What's this about a black guy
in the office?Copy !req
99. Black eye, Meredith.Copy !req
100. Will someone please explain
what's going on here?Copy !req
101. Since the interesting thing
happened till now,Copy !req
102. so much time has passed,
it's like my life is buffering.Copy !req
103. Here's what happened.Copy !req
104. Pam and I were arriving
for the day,Copy !req
105. and there was a gang
in the parking lotCopy !req
106. on bikes,
on— on motorcycles.Copy !req
107. And they just were
hassling Pam...Copy !req
108. - That's true.
- They had, uh...Copy !req
109. - Weapons.
- Weapons.Copy !req
110. I just stepped in to talk
some sense into them.Copy !req
111. But these were not the kind
of people who use their words.Copy !req
112. Punches were going,
and I ducked a few,Copy !req
113. landed a couple,
and I was fighting them off.Copy !req
114. It was totally, like—
like, senseless crime.Copy !req
115. - Thank goodness he was there.
- Good job, Andy.Copy !req
116. Yeah!Copy !req
117. I didn't do anything
any of you wouldn't have done.Copy !req
118. Open the gates!Copy !req
119. There's plenty for everyone.
No need to panic.Copy !req
120. - There's plenty for everyone!
- Quit it!Copy !req
121. There's plenty!
Don't stampede.Copy !req
122. No need to stampede, sir.Copy !req
123. - I was ahead of you!
- Okay, okay, hey, hey!Copy !req
124. It's gonna be fine.Copy !req
125. It's gonna be fine.
There's plenty of pyramids.Copy !req
126. Come on.
I was in line before you.Copy !req
127. So you're a blogger, right?Copy !req
128. Yeah. Blogger.Copy !req
129. God, stay away.Copy !req
130. Oh, I always get in trouble
around bloggers.Copy !req
131. I'm trying to be
a good girl for once.Copy !req
132. Uh, yeah, I already
bought my pyramid,Copy !req
133. but I don't want to leave yet.Copy !req
134. I haven't had so much fun
since seeing...Copy !req
135. Zoo-ey Desh-channel at
the Couch-arilla Music Festival.Copy !req
136. So fun.Copy !req
137. How can we feel safe knowing
that there are gangs here?Copy !req
138. We should call the police
right now!Copy !req
139. - No!
- Yes!Copy !req
140. No, no, no, no, no, we don't
need to call the police.Copy !req
141. They'll just ask everybody
questions,Copy !req
142. get up in everyone's business,
right, Pam?Copy !req
143. Police are a hassle.
We settled this on the street.Copy !req
144. And my eye will heal.
But if the police come,Copy !req
145. then we will forever
stain our neighborhoodCopy !req
146. as a troubled area.Copy !req
147. Why would you careCopy !req
148. what the police think
of our neighborhood?Copy !req
149. Because I have
neighborhood pride.Copy !req
150. 1-8-5-0-5.Copy !req
151. - 1-8-5-0-5.
- Guys, guys.Copy !req
152. That's so vague.Copy !req
153. You gotta do the zip plus 4.Copy !req
154. 1-8-5-0-5...Copy !req
155. Dash 7-4-2-7!Copy !req
156. Look, I don't feel safe.Copy !req
157. I think we should
call the police.Copy !req
158. Exactly.
We need to feel safe.Copy !req
159. Which is why...Copy !req
160. Toby is teaching us
self-defense.Copy !req
161. Me?Copy !req
162. Toby, will you teach us
self-defense?Copy !req
163. Yeah. Um... I can't
believe you rememberedCopy !req
164. I do self-defense.Copy !req
165. Um, I'll go put on my cup.Copy !req
166. Great.Copy !req
167. - Yes!
- Okay.Copy !req
168. I wasn't sure which one
of you was Chuck!Copy !req
169. Yeah, no, it seems
to be going great.Copy !req
170. Andy got beat up
by a fifth grade girl?Copy !req
171. Look at that guy.Copy !req
172. He's got his Sabre phone on,
and he's not even using it.Copy !req
173. This is a perfect photo
for my "Daily Fail" blog.Copy !req
174. Uh, I-I gotta go.
Okay.Copy !req
175. Dwight, what is a fail?
That sounds bad.Copy !req
176. Oh, no, no, no.
It's good.Copy !req
177. It's really— on the Internet,
it's a really—Copy !req
178. That's a really good,
good thing.Copy !req
179. Are you trying to sabotage
this entire event?Copy !req
180. I'm very sorry.Copy !req
181. We gave you
an Arrowhead for freeCopy !req
182. for the day.Copy !req
183. How hard would it have beenCopy !req
184. to do this, hmm?Copy !req
185. "Hello. Hi, sweetie.
It's Jim.Copy !req
186. "I'm calling you
from the new Arrowhead,Copy !req
187. "which is why my voice
is crystal clearCopy !req
188. "and my hand
won't ever get tiredCopy !req
189. because of the ergonomic
shape."Copy !req
190. I'm really sorry.
Is there anything I can do,Copy !req
191. maybe pretend to be Chuck?Copy !req
192. You could have pretended
to be Chuck.Copy !req
193. I begged you to pretend
to be Chuck,Copy !req
194. but you chose to be yourself,Copy !req
195. and you can no longer be Chuck!Copy !req
196. Surrender the tripack.Copy !req
197. You know what you have to do.Copy !req
198. Point it towards
the store, idiot!Copy !req
199. You know what I mean...?Copy !req
200. One of these buttons is—Copy !req
201. Damn it.
Take over.Copy !req
202. Oh, hey, hey, hey,
you guys, you must be lost.Copy !req
203. Listen.
Excuse me, sir.Copy !req
204. Yeah, the fountain where
you can feed the pigeonsCopy !req
205. is out behind the bank.Copy !req
206. Tell your great grandson
to bring his kid by.Copy !req
207. Okay. So long.
Here we go.Copy !req
208. Erin! Psst!
Come on!Copy !req
209. The elderly suck the life
out of the young.Copy !req
210. Get them out of here!Copy !req
211. We are closed!
Come on.Copy !req
212. Self-defense is not
some fun boxing match, okay?Copy !req
213. This is about escaping
with your life.Copy !req
214. So... Strike,
scream, and run.Copy !req
215. All right?
Let's try it.Copy !req
216. Ow.Copy !req
217. That may have been my fault.Copy !req
218. What the hell, Toby?Copy !req
219. Okay, look,
in a real crisis situation,Copy !req
220. you're not gonna
have time to think, okay?Copy !req
221. So just remember,
I-a-a-t-g.Copy !req
222. "It's all about the groin."Copy !req
223. What if you're being
attacked by a...Copy !req
224. Smallish manCopy !req
225. who happens to not
have a groin?Copy !req
226. I don't think
that's very common.Copy !req
227. What if you're being attacked
by a 4'11" manCopy !req
228. - who's penisless?
- Why are you fixatedCopy !req
229. on this hypothetical
transgendered attacker?Copy !req
230. Why don't we start
with the basics?Copy !req
231. Show us how to defend ourselves
against a baby,Copy !req
232. and then like
a fifth-grade girl,Copy !req
233. and then, you know,
if we have time,Copy !req
234. on up to a scary man.Copy !req
235. Well, the most common scenarioCopy !req
236. is a larger man
attacking a smaller female.Copy !req
237. So in that scenario,Copy !req
238. what if the victimCopy !req
239. sucker-punches the attacker
in the face?Copy !req
240. What can the attacker then doCopy !req
241. to better protect himself?Copy !req
242. It's interesting
that you're drawnCopy !req
243. to the point of view
of the attacker.Copy !req
244. You would like
the turn of the table.Copy !req
245. Okay, the latest
Chad Flenderman novel...Copy !req
246. Based from the point of viewCopy !req
247. of his nemesis,
Dr. Lucifer Wu.Copy !req
248. Can I please leave?
I have a rape flute.Copy !req
249. All right, well, let's try
one simple technique together.Copy !req
250. Why doesn't everyone stand?
Okay, so...Copy !req
251. You're being attacked.
You got your hands up.Copy !req
252. Simple palm strike to the chin.Copy !req
253. Up to the chin.
One, two.Copy !req
254. One, two.Copy !req
255. - One, two.
- Take that, kid.Copy !req
256. Cathy, I would like
to introduce youCopy !req
257. to fatty gruesome.Copy !req
258. He is a freelancer
for Wired Magazine.Copy !req
259. Patty Grossman.
I'm a woman.Copy !req
260. But you still work for
Wired, right?Copy !req
261. Yes.
Good!Copy !req
262. Okay. Flirt away.Copy !req
263. Sabre.Copy !req
264. It's time to come home.Copy !req
265. Yeah.Copy !req
266. Yeah. I mean, I think...Copy !req
267. It seemed like you were
a little nervous.Copy !req
268. Yeah, no, Sherlock!
Can somebody please tell meCopy !req
269. something encouraging
about this presentationCopy !req
270. before I go out there in front
of a million people and do it?Copy !req
271. I know, I know, champ,
just calm down,Copy !req
272. because listen...Copy !req
273. When you're out in front
of all those people...Copy !req
274. - Yeah, what?
- You just need to realizeCopy !req
275. so much rides on this.Copy !req
276. - You have no idea.
- Dwight.Copy !req
277. I'm trying to make him
feel important.Copy !req
278. God. I wish Kelly
were here.Copy !req
279. She always knew what to say.Copy !req
280. Um...Copy !req
281. Oh, Ryan,Copy !req
282. you're so smart.Copy !req
283. You're smarter than
Mark ZuckerbergCopy !req
284. and those Google guys
all combined.Copy !req
285. - Hee hee hee.
- You're so ignorant,Copy !req
286. you barely know
what you're talking about.Copy !req
287. That's so ridiculous.Copy !req
288. You really need
to read a couple of books.Copy !req
289. What's a book?Copy !req
290. Oh, my God.
You're so embarrassing.Copy !req
291. My mom would say
the best stuff, though.Copy !req
292. You can...Copy !req
293. You can do it, Ryan.Copy !req
294. And you know
that I'm capable of this.Copy !req
295. - You're the only one
who can do it, s-sweetie.Copy !req
296. What did you think
of the presentation?Copy !req
297. I thought it was great,
sweetie.Copy !req
298. I would just fix
that one—Copy !req
299. Oh, "fix" means you hate it!
I knew it!Copy !req
300. - I need something to drink!
- Jim, get him a water.Copy !req
301. No, not a water.
A sports drink.Copy !req
302. I hate everything
in that fridge.Copy !req
303. Not red— Get me something
yellow or greenCopy !req
304. from a nearby store.Copy !req
305. Not red!Copy !req
306. Why are you just
standing there?Copy !req
307. Go to a nearby store and get him
a yellow or green sports drink!Copy !req
308. Now, if your attacker
is willing to defile a corpse,Copy !req
309. you better stop playing dead
right awayCopy !req
310. and just make it known
that you're alive.Copy !req
311. Forgive me for interrupting.Copy !req
312. I believe my daughterCopy !req
313. had an altercation
with somebody here,Copy !req
314. some fancy gentleman
with a squeaky voice?Copy !req
315. I think you guys
might have the wrong office.Copy !req
316. That's him...
The guy I hit.Copy !req
317. - What?
- You've gotta be kidding me.Copy !req
318. Poor Andy!Copy !req
319. First you got beat up
by a gang,Copy !req
320. - and now she kicks your ass?
- No, Kevin—Copy !req
321. What about the lady you hit
with a pine cone?Copy !req
322. There.
That chubby one.Copy !req
323. I just had a baby.Copy !req
324. - Yesterday?
- Wow.Copy !req
325. Apologize.Copy !req
326. Sorry I kicked your assCopy !req
327. in front of your "thin"
girlfriend.Copy !req
328. How 'bout we wait
till next yearCopy !req
329. after you have your kid?Copy !req
330. You know what?
Tiffy's going to college.Copy !req
331. Listen, I don't knowCopy !req
332. what you guys
are talking about,Copy !req
333. but I guess I'll just
accept your apologyCopy !req
334. so we can get on with our day.Copy !req
335. God bless.Copy !req
336. Friend of mine uses your paper.Copy !req
337. You do good work.Copy !req
338. - Bye-bye.
- Bye.Copy !req
339. So, Toby, I think we should
do a differentCopy !req
340. self-defense seminar—Copy !req
341. "How to protect ourselves
against tiny little girls."Copy !req
342. There's no shame in getting
beaten up by a girl.Copy !req
343. My ex-wife
used to demolish me.Copy !req
344. No, there is shame in it, okay?Copy !req
345. We have
to draw the line somewhere.Copy !req
346. Oh, my God, I think I see
the imprint of a ring pop.Copy !req
347. Oh...Copy !req
348. Have you seen Erin?Copy !req
349. I'm on break.Copy !req
350. Oh, God!
No, hey, bloggers,Copy !req
351. where do you think
you're going?Copy !req
352. No, no, no, you gotta stay
for the big presentation.Copy !req
353. We got
this young whiz kid— Ryan.Copy !req
354. He's like an even
more handsome Bill Gates.Copy !req
355. When's the presentation?Copy !req
356. It's moments away.
Just stay here!Copy !req
357. Hey, Uncle Lucas,
it's your nephew, Ryan.Copy !req
358. Honestly, I could use
a prescriptionCopy !req
359. for ritalin right now.Copy !req
360. Well, I know you did one
for Aunt Carol.Copy !req
361. Oh, so it's different
because it's your wife?Copy !req
362. Well, that doesn't make
any sense to me.Copy !req
363. - How you doing?
- Don't talk to me right now.Copy !req
364. I'm sorry,
I know you're my boss,Copy !req
365. but seriously, you need to get
the hell out of my face.Copy !req
366. What I don't understand
is why...Copy !req
367. Your little man is unraveling.Copy !req
368. Now, go and fix it.Copy !req
369. Sorry about kicking you out.Copy !req
370. It's just we don't want
our brand associated with death.Copy !req
371. It's okay.
I'll go to the CostcoCopy !req
372. and search for handsome men.Copy !req
373. You're not married yet?Copy !req
374. Oh, I was.Copy !req
375. My husband was my best friend.Copy !req
376. He passed away.Copy !req
377. My best friend
was my boss Andy.Copy !req
378. We dated for a while,Copy !req
379. but since then, he rejected me,Copy !req
380. and we're not really friends.Copy !req
381. Someone rejected you?Copy !req
382. With that bodyCopy !req
383. and those bazongas?Copy !req
384. Forget him!Copy !req
385. Yeah!
Forget him!Copy !req
386. And you should
forget your husband.Copy !req
387. Well...Copy !req
388. How long has he
been in the bathroom?Copy !req
389. - About ten minutes.
- Jeez!Copy !req
390. What's he doing in there?Copy !req
391. Oop, that's my phone.
Am I allowed to answer it,Copy !req
392. - or are you gonna freak out?
- Are there bloggers around?Copy !req
393. It's Ryan.
"I'm sorry. I lied.Copy !req
394. "I'm not in the bathroom.
I can't do it.Copy !req
395. I need to see my mom.
I'm going home."Copy !req
396. What is the delay here?Copy !req
397. Where's Ryan?Copy !req
398. Why is he not here?Copy !req
399. I had to send him home.Copy !req
400. As brilliant and creative
as he is,Copy !req
401. he is nothing...Copy !req
402. - Compared to this guy!
- Uh...Copy !req
403. - What?
- That's right.Copy !req
404. Will you just give us a second?Copy !req
405. You are gonna bloody ruin it.Copy !req
406. You're gonna bloody ruin it
because you're a no-goodCopy !req
407. - half-ass cockeyed...
- Okay.Copy !req
408. - That's—
- Jim—Copy !req
409. - I'm not doing
the presentation.Copy !req
410. Look at me.
Look at me!Copy !req
411. Look... At... This... Face.Copy !req
412. This is not the face
of a performer.Copy !req
413. This is the face
of a scary apparitionCopy !req
414. you see before you die.Copy !req
415. I'm telling you...Copy !req
416. If you don't do this,Copy !req
417. I don't stand a chance.Copy !req
418. Please, Jim.Copy !req
419. Okay. I'll do it.Copy !req
420. Oh, my God.Copy !req
421. O... kay!Copy !req
422. Go get into Ryan's costume
and check out his notes.Copy !req
423. - A costume?
- Of course there's a costume!Copy !req
424. Oh, this is gonna be great.Copy !req
425. There's nothing like
some last-minute changesCopy !req
426. to really energize
a presentation.Copy !req
427. Huh?Copy !req
428. Did you pass out in there?
What is taking so long?Copy !req
429. I've been in here
for 20 seconds.Copy !req
430. Hurry up.
Let me in.Copy !req
431. I wanna watch you get dressed.Copy !req
432. Did you find the eyeliner?Copy !req
433. I'm not wearing eyeliner.Copy !req
434. You are wearing eyeliner, Jim.Copy !req
435. Time. Space.Copy !req
436. Gender.Copy !req
437. There are no rules anymore.Copy !req
438. All boundaries
are breaking downCopy !req
439. in the wake
of the infinite future.Copy !req
440. The only thing that—Copy !req
441. The only thing that remain—Copy !req
442. The only thing that remains
are the thingsCopy !req
443. that have stood
the test of time—Copy !req
444. Love, values,Copy !req
445. and of course,
the pyramids—Copy !req
446. The strongest shape
ever constructed,Copy !req
447. a shape that fitsCopy !req
448. all other shapes inside of it.Copy !req
449. No, that—Copy !req
450. It's true.Copy !req
451. This... is the future,Copy !req
452. because...Copy !req
453. this is the past.Copy !req
454. I've been through a lot
of issues in my life.Copy !req
455. I've seen drug addiction,Copy !req
456. unemployment.Copy !req
457. I've been in a relationship
that tore my heart apartCopy !req
458. without ever being able
to acceptCopy !req
459. that love drove the pain.Copy !req
460. Yep.Copy !req
461. When I was ten years old,Copy !req
462. my parents took me
to Disney World.Copy !req
463. I cried the whole time.Copy !req
464. I was not able to comprehendCopy !req
465. the beauty that was before me.Copy !req
466. I just wanted...
To go home.Copy !req
467. This is what the pyramid
will do for you.Copy !req
468. It is the bridge to the world.Copy !req
469. It has a USB port.Copy !req
470. Wireless...Copy !req
471. Will be available in 2013.Copy !req
472. You can play anythingCopy !req
473. from Chuck to Cars 2.Copy !req
474. With the pyramid,Copy !req
475. you have the connectionCopy !req
476. to everything,Copy !req
477. in time...Copy !req
478. and space.Copy !req
479. Oh!Copy !req
480. Psst!Copy !req
481. Oh.Copy !req
482. Sabre.Copy !req
483. It's time...
to come home.Copy !req
484. All right.Copy !req
485. Thank you so much.
Wow.Copy !req
486. Wow!Copy !req
487. And good night.Copy !req
488. Yeah.Copy !req
489. Thank you.Copy !req
490. Thank you very much.Copy !req
491. Okay, this isn't over.
Let's stay focused, okay?Copy !req
492. We made fun of Andy earlierCopy !req
493. for getting beat up
by a little girl,Copy !req
494. but... little things
can be dangerous.Copy !req
495. Whether it's a GremlinCopy !req
496. or Chucky The Doll—Copy !req
497. The key is to throw it
in something.Copy !req
498. Like a fireplaceCopy !req
499. or a tub of electricity.Copy !req
500. Okay, good point.
Um...Copy !req
501. Good point?
What is a tub of electricity?Copy !req
502. - I don't— I don't—
- With all due respect,Copy !req
503. we know
what we're defending against.Copy !req
504. It's a 12-year-old
female bully.Copy !req
505. - I was a 12-year-old bully.
- Great!Copy !req
506. I think Kelly
should attack Toby.Copy !req
507. Yeah.Copy !req
508. Yeah, that's not
a bad idea, actually,Copy !req
509. because I have had a lot
of pent-up aggression.Copy !req
510. - Thanks.
- Good. Go.Copy !req
511. - I don't know if this
is gonna help—Copy !req
512. Let's go, Kelly.Copy !req
513. We should stay to maybe
some more traditional models—Copy !req
514. You think you're so pretty!Copy !req
515. Well, you're not gonna be
so pretty come prom time!Copy !req
516. Okay, this is what's called
pre-violent posturing.Copy !req
517. Take that!
Not so pre-violent anymore!Copy !req
518. Okay, I'm at what's called
"the decision point."Copy !req
519. - Hey, hey, hey,
Kelly, Kelly, Kelly—Copy !req
520. Ow!Copy !req
521. God! My good eye!Copy !req
522. Oh, boy!Copy !req
523. Oh, no, I'm not
laughing at you.Copy !req
524. I'm laughing at, um...
something thatCopy !req
525. Cece did on the playground
earlier— Yesterday.Copy !req
526. This morning.Copy !req
527. You know why I got
hit by girls?Copy !req
528. Because I stood up
for others...Copy !req
529. Pam and Toby.Copy !req
530. I stepped in, and I didn't careCopy !req
531. that I was standing up
to girls.Copy !req
532. You may wanna ask yourselves,Copy !req
533. "where were you
when the girls came?"Copy !req
534. Tough day. Yes.
But I feel good.Copy !req
535. I put the office
in their place,Copy !req
536. took a bunch of pain killers,
drank half a bottle of wine,Copy !req
537. took my pants off.Copy !req
538. I just feel good!Copy !req
539. Okay, okay, I will be
the first to admit it.Copy !req
540. We could have integrated more
Chuck into the presentation.Copy !req
541. Dwight.Copy !req
542. You're the Vice President.Copy !req
543. Ha ha ha ha!
Yeah!Copy !req
544. Okay!Copy !req
545. - Come on!
- Aah!Copy !req
546. Right on!Copy !req
547. Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam!Copy !req
548. Boom!Copy !req